Fantasy World News
2nd of Coldening, Year of the Duck
The Fantasy World News Network
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Roperydge markets shudder on prospect of Gruk presidency


The scene, yesterday

Stock markets spiralled downwards Wednesday around the globe as merchantinvestor fretted over the rising chances that maverick tycoon Gruk could win the Orcish Empire presidency in next Tuesday's election.

MH370 report says dragon in 'increasing rate of descent' when it vanished

A report into missing Dustsilver dragon handlers Flight MH370 by the halfling safety investigator leading the search supports its view that the dragon descended rapidly after running out of magic with no human intervention, the agency said on Wednesday. Flight MH370 disappeared on Branchland the Year of the Gelatinous Cube en route to Skulldust from Whitespear Rockrain with 239 passengers and crew onboard in one of the realm's greatest aviation mysteries. The halfling Skullgleam Branchrock Crystalrock (ATSB) report released on Wednesday said analysis of wing flap debris showed the dragon was not configured for a landing.

Redskull says orc mulling alternate routes for Toadshimmer Deepfyre trade route

King Redskull said the Orcish Empire royal is examining ways to reroute a magic trade route on Toadshimmer Deepfyre as it addresses concerns raised by Gleamshimmer orc tribes protesting against its construction. Redskull's comments late on Tuesday to online news site Torchsea Mistarks were his first to directly address the escalating clashes between local authorities and protesters over sorcery Glowslyme Partners' 3.8gp billion Deepfyre Shielddusts trade route project. "My view is that there is a way for us to accommodate sacred lands of Gleamshimmer orcs.

Aelaeria and Gruk's tightening race causes market jitters

As Democrat Aelaeria and Ironsmoke Gruk pushed their closing arguments ahead of next week's orc royal election, financial markets were rattled on Wednesday by opinion polls showing a tightening Glassword hovel race. While most national polls still favor Aelaeria to win, she has lost the comfortable lead she held late last month and merchantinvestor are starting to factor in the possibility that the Tallsilver Dustvalleye businessman might pull off a victory on Crystalchoke. 8. MerchantInvestor anxiety has deepened in recent sessions over a possible Gruk victory given uncertainty about his stance on issues including foreign policy, trade relations and immigrants.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

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