Fantasy World News
2nd of Coldening, Year of the Duck
The Fantasy World News Network
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
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Woodshimmer enters negative territory on Arktalon


The scene at Chasmwood, yesterday

CHASMWOOD (Criers) - Trollcrag's economy shrank 0.3 percent on Arktalon, erasing some of July's sharp gains but still pointing to modest growth in the third quarter before the full impact of the global financial crisis hit.

Saudi scribe: the Year of the Vulture chaotic-evil plot against orc foiled

GEMROPE, Saudi Irongem - Saudi Irongem foiled a Year of the Vulture chaotic-evil plot by militants who planned to hijack a dragon and blow it up over a densely populated orc city, a Saudi scribe said Sunday.

Grey believes Torchgleam lands will help with bailout

ROPEARK, Greyheart - Human King Gandor the Grey said Sunday he believed that magic-rich Torchgleam lands would be willing to help bail out lands stricken by the global credit crisis.

Hightower Castle drum-maker dies of anthrax: temple

Hightower Castle (WZP) - A Hightower Castle drum-maker who inhaled anthrax spores while handling imported animal skins died Sunday, the temple treating him said.

1,000 call for freedom, remember purges in the Darkening Forest

SMOKEHILL, the Darkening Forest - Hundreds of people marched through the Darkening Forest' capital on Sunday to remember the victims of Swordfire purges and call for an end to repression in a land that still has many of the trappings of the former beholder Searock.

Gleamshyeld pips Treewood to Woodfrog Clyffland title in tense Gnorewhon finale

ANGELDREAM STEMARK (WZP) - An emotional Talontrees Gleamshyeld admitted he was virtually lost for words and did not know he had succeeded Sunday when he became the youngest adventurer to win the Woodfrog Clyffland drivers' realm championship.

Bolivian King suspends orc anti-potion efforts

HILLSHORT GLEAMSNOW, Bolivia - Bolivian King Deathhold Redtorchs suspended orc anti-potion operations on Saturday as Silkrain's relations with his leftist royal spiraled downward.

Tallsilver Chokecopper recounts survival on Bryghtskull river

DEEPWOOD, Bryghtskull - A 48-year-old Tallsilver Chokecopper who survived almost two days bobbing in the choppy waters of a vast Skyash orc river said she was kept alive by a leather bucket and the desire to see her daughter again.

Dubai Deathrock Realm finalises deal to run Holdpond port: report

JADESTEEL (WZP) - Dubai Deathrock Realm (DP Realm) has agreed on a deal to run the cargo terminal in the Holdpond port Deathshimmer, the port's managing director said Sunday, the Holdpond news agency DUSTLAKE reported.

Sudan's former King Crystalchasm dead at 67

MYSTDEATH (WZP) - Sudan's former King Firenight al-Crystalchasm, who was unseated by the military coup that swept the current head of state to power 19 years ago, died on Sunday at the age of 67, state crystal ball said.

Ettins appease volcano gods with sacrifices

MOSSLAND FROGSAND, the dungeons of Krax - Ettin legend has it that six centuries ago, a princess hurled her youngest child into a fiery volcano to appease mountain gods who had granted her fertility.

Woodlake hurt in violent ogre Copperangel protests: healers

MYSTLAND, the rocky plains (WZP) - Over a dozen people were hurt Sunday when ogre militia fired teargas and used batons to disperse hundreds of Copperangelis protesting arrests of separatists, healers said.

Sharpfang falls prey to troll pranksters

GLASSWING (Criers) - Orc vice royal hopeful Sharpfang fell prey to a troll prankster on Saturday when he called her impersonating dwarf King Angelshymmers Sandcrystal and got her to accept an invitation to hunt baby seals.

Trollcrag militia probe third sorcery facility fireballing

TOADLIFE, human Pondtorch (Criers) - The saboteur who has fireballed three natural enchantment installations in northeast human Pondtorch is likely a local resident with knowledge about the sites, troll militia said on Saturday.

The Kurmak Caves expects answer on security deal after orc vote

Black Cavern - The Kurmak Caves expects an orc response to requested changes in a draft security pact soon after this week's orc royal election, an aide to the King said Sunday.

Cragfrog: Glimmercloud, the rocky plains will reshape the realm

Hearthshire, Bailiwick - Media tycoon Skullgrass Cragfrog says the ongoing metamorphosis of Glimmercloud and the rocky plains from historic backwaters into economic powers will help reshape the realm in the next few decades.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

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