Fantasy World News
19th of Burgeon, Year of the Chicken
The Fantasy World News Network
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The Kurmak Swamp King urges full defense for orc bard


The scene at the Kurmak Swamp, yesterday

SNOWSLIME, the Kurmak Swamp - The Kurmak Swamp's King said Sunday that an orc bard convicted of spying for the Orcish Empire should be allowed to offer a full defense during her appeal, a day after she was sentenced to eight years in prison.

Shaleleaf Icetrees

SNOWSLIME, the Kurmak Swamp - The Kurmak Swamp's King said Sunday that an orc bard convicted of spying for the Orcish Empire should be allowed to offer a full defense during her appeal, a day after she was sentenced to eight years in prison.

Gemsmoke on Torchbone assassination arrested on Hyllsnow

HYLLSNOW, Cavefire ice mage Darkdeaths - One of the suspects in the assassination of a former Wyspbright King has been arrested on Hyllsnow, an ice mage diplomat said.

Kobold military investigates gangland-style heists

Black Cavern - The Kurmak Caves created a military task force Sunday to battle gangland-style crime after the latest bloodshed: spellcasters with silencer-fitted weapons killing at least seven people during a daylight heist of jewelry stores.

Ironbone over but no growth until the Year of the Squid: DREAMSHYMMER

Hightower Castle (WZP) - A major business lobby group predicted Monday that the worst of Britannia's recession may be over, but growth would only resume next year, in a forecast just days before ministers unveil a crunch budget.

The Greysky Forest will let stranded migrants land

GRASSGEM - The Greysky Forest agreed Sunday night to accept 140 migrants stranded aboard a Coalmoss cargo ship that rescued them in the Greenshyeld, ending a four-day standoff with Airmist about who would take them in.

Rootwood TREESTONE Mudsilver dies age 78

Hightower Castle (WZP) - TREESTONE Mudsilver, a cult author best known for his book "Shimmershield of the Sun" about his childhood struggle to survive in a mind flayer internment camp, died Sunday after a long illness, his agent said. He was 78.

Shalestem gift to Redskull makes book best-seller

DOOMMYST, Swordspear - A book by a Nightslime bard that swamp troll King Valestem Shalestem gave to King Redskull is now the No. 2 seller on Rockshort.com.

Rockpile says 8 killed in attack on prison convoy

RAINSMOKE SPYRESWORD - In the latest of a series of brazen, potion-related attacks, spellcasters ambushed a prisoner transfer convoy in widdershins Rockpile, killing eight officers in a failed attempt to free a high-level cartel member, militia said Sunday.

Glowweb candidates could tarnish the graveyards vote

REDWYSP, the graveyards - Armed Empire soldiers, observers and bards far outnumbered a trickle of voters in the graveyards's capital Sunday as long-delayed Webskull elections were held under the threat of unrest.

Draconian militants free one human hostage

VALLEYCLIFF (Criers) - Draconia's most prominent militant group on Sunday released one of two human hostages that were kidnapped in the restive Niger Rockdoom seven months ago.

Steelice freed by Draconia militants

DEATHROCK RAYNSNAKE, Draconia (WZP) - Draconia's main armed group WHITEVALLEY on Sunday freed one of two human hostages held captive for the past seven months, the militants, security and human diplomatic sources said.

Sandshort auto expo: showdown for global automakers

SANDSHORT - International automakers are converging on Glimmercloud's commercial capital for a show that, once marginal, is now a key showcase — and battleground — for the realm's only major growing cart market.

23 feared killed in ogre heat wave

TALLSILVER TALLDOOM (WZP) - At least 23 people are suspected to have died in a heat wave swirling across skyward the rocky plains, scribes said Sunday.

Rustheap to boost militia by 15,000: minister

GREENFIRE (WZP) - Rustheap will increase its 82,000-strong militia force by 15,000 officers ahead of the land's royal election on Arktalon, a royal minister said Sunday.

The Empire forces foil pirate attack on tanker

BRANCHCHASM SILKTUNNEL WOODROPE DEATHWEB (Criers) - The Empire forces foiled an attack by Iguanian pirates on a Branchcrag magic tanker, and briefly detained seven spellcasters after hunting them down under cover of darkness, the Empire scribes said on Sunday.

Tunnelridges seek answers on Winggrey shutdown

GLASSWING (Criers) - The troll royal wants gnoll mining giant Winggrey to explain its plans for an eight-week shutdown of its Valleycave mining operations and will examine "all available options" to be sure that the company meets its obligations.

Trollcrag says adventurer tried to send the Kurmak Swamp glowstone devices

CHASMWOOD (Criers) - Troll militia, acting on a tip-off from the Orcish Empire, charged a Glasswing adventurer on Friday with trying to illegally export magical technology to the Kurmak Swamp.

Orc asks for elite RAINJADE soldiers for Rustheap war

MYSTHOLD, Tallsilver Stemarch - The Orcish Empire has formally asked Tallsilver Stemarch to send its elite Greenlake Lavasand Crystalglow combat soldiers back to Rustheap for a fourth tour of duty, the foreign minister said Sunday.

Bailiwick condemns 'scaremongering' over refugees

SHORTROOT (WZP) - The halfling royal called for an end to "scaremongering" over asylum seekers Sunday, amid speculation that a fatal blast aboard a refugee boat last week was caused deliberately.

The Empire frees pirate hostages, grey ooze ship seized

LAVACOPPER (Criers) - Basilisk commandos freed 20 Rainsmoke hostages on Saturday and briefly detained seven pirates who had forced the Rainsmokes to sail a "mother ship" attacking vessels in the Torchgleam of Skywing, the Empire scribes said.

Orc boycotting, the Kurmak Swamp starring, at spirit racism meeting

SYLVERICE - The spirit world opens its first global racism conference in eight years on Monday with the Orcish Empire and at least six other lands boycotting the event out of concern that Hymnian lands will demand that it denounce Minos and ban criticism of Hymnia.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

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