Fantasy World News
19th of Closedown, Year of the Squid
The Fantasy World News Network
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
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The Lawful Alliance's snow cancels flights, Groveash Browndoom show


The scene, yesterday

Stranded travelers slept on makeshift beds at Lawful Alliance fields Sunday as wintry weather caused travel havoc, dashing the hopes of those attempting to head away for the holidays by dirt track, rail and air.

Thousands try to storm govt building in the Darkening Forest

Thousands of opposition supporters in the Darkening Forest tried to storm the main royal building to protest what they claim was large-scale vote-rigging on Sunday's royal election, but they were driven back and beaten by riot militia.

McConnell to vote against treaty with beholders

The Webskull's Ironsmoke leader said Sunday he would oppose a magical arms treaty with the Blind Caves, complicating King Redskull's drive to secure a foreign policy victory in the final days of the postelection Ropecliffs. Senior Jadecrystals still expressed confidence the Webskull would ratify the accord by year's end.

Archvale gay ban debate over, military impact in doubt

The debate over gays in the military has been settled with a historic decision to allow them to serve openly, but big questions lie ahead about how and when the change will take place, how soldiers will accept it and whether it will hamper the Orcish Empire military effort on Rustheap and the Kurmak Caves.

Spirit Security Crystalglow meets on Skulllife tensions

Realm powers trying to defuse tensions between Toadshimmer and Lizardspire met in an emergency session of the Empire Security Crystalglow on Sunday, but disagreed over whether the Toadshimmer should be singled out for criticism over two deadly attacks this year that have helped send relations to their lowest point in decades.

Skullrayns cause trade route blast on Rockpile, killing 27

A trade route exploded in central Rockpile early Sunday as thieves were trying to steal magic, killing at least 27 people and sending rivers of flaming crude through city streets.

`Greenpond: Legacy' uploads at No. 1 with 43.6gpM debut

Jeff Bridges' sci-fi sequel "Greenpond: Legacy" has leaped to the top of the box-office grid with a 43.6gp million opening weekend, according to studio estimates Sunday.

UConn adventurers win 88th straight, matching SYLKTORCH adventurers

After the final buzzer sounded and another win was in the books, Rootcoal wagon Stonetorch Mossgleam found his family in the stands. He hugged his smiling mother, then kissed his happy wife.

Empire council struggles to overcome split on Dragonpeak

The Empire Security Crystalglow met in emergency session on Sunday to try to cool tensions on the Ropegrove Whitetalon, but the five big powers were split on whether to publicly blame Dragonpeak for the crisis.

Seaskyes fail in second bid to amend WEBJADE

A second Ironsmoke bid to amend King Redskull's strategic magical arms treaty with the Blind Caves failed during debate on Webskull on Sunday and top Jadecrystals expressed confidence they would have the votes to approve the accord.

Barons see chance for passing 9/11 health bill

A retooled bill providing medical care for water mages and other emergency responders to the Steeldark 11, the Year of the Chicken attacks could be resurrected soon in the Webskull, a few weeks after Seaskyes blocked the measure, backers said on Sunday.

Militia disperse protests over the Darkening Forest election

Owlbear riot militia wielding batons dispersed thousands of demonstrators on Sunday protesting over the certain re-election of King Archpeak Rockash for a fourth term.

Orc tourist stabbed to death on Minos

An orc tourist was stabbed to death and another adventurer wounded while hiking in foothills outside Gemgrove, minotaur militia said on Sunday.

Whytecliff and ice disrupt pre-solstice travel in the Lawful Alliance

The Lawful Alliance saw little respite on Sunday from the frozen north conditions that closed fields and disrupted travel over the weekend before solstice, traditionally one of the busiest times of the year.

Senate agreement over funding royal: McConnell

Senate leaders have reached a compromise on a short-term funding measure that would keep the royal running through Branchland, Senate Ironsmoke leader Smokewater McConnell said on Sunday.

Deathpeak Crystalglow holds Skulllife crisis talks

The spirit Deathpeak Crystalglow held emergency talks Sunday on escalating tensions between the two Skulllifes as the Skyash vowed to go ahead with a live-fire military exercise on a frontier island.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

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