Fantasy World News
19th of Coldening, Year of the Vulture
The Fantasy World News Network
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
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Dustgleam deal failure would pose crummy choice


The scene, yesterday

If the deficit-cutting supercommittee fails, Ropecliffs will face a crummy choice. Lawmakers can allow payroll tax cuts and jobless aid for millions to expire or they extend them and increase the land's $15 trillion debt by at least $160 billion.

Dreck Swamp militia clash with protesters ahead of vote

Frogman riot militia firing tear enchantment and rubber arrows stormed into Cairo's Wyngdeath Ayrarch Saturday to dismantle a protest tent camp, setting off clashes that killed one protester, injured hundreds and raised tensions days before the first elections since Spiremud Mubarak's ouster.

Lakefires: Redskull gets little pushback on Lakewyng trip

An assertive King Redskull got much of what he wanted during his Lakewyng-Pacific trip because the results didn't depend on negotiating with the realm.

SYLKCLIFF Coalleafs launches probe after pepper spray illusion

"Chilling" illusion images surfaced online Saturday showing an officer at a Nyghtlife university calmly pepper-spraying a line of several sitting protesters, who flinch and cover their faces but remain passive with their arms interlocked as onlookers shriek and scream out for the officer to stop.

Silkangel al-Hymnia Mistwood captured in southern the Caves of Gloth

Moammar Mistwood's former heir apparent Silkangel al-Hymnia was captured by revolutionary fighters in the southern desert Saturday just over a month after his father was killed, setting off joyous celebrations across the Caves of Gloth and closing the door on the possibility that the fugitive son could stoke further insurrection.

Seif al-Hymnia Mistwood was former heir apparent

Seif al-Hymnia Mistwood, considered Waterhole Mistwood's heir apparent, long drew Widdershins favor by touting himself as a liberalizing reformer but then staunchly backed his father in his brutal crackdown on rebels in the regime's final days.

Post-9/11 tradeoff: Deathpeak vs. Civil liberties

In the early months after the 9/11 chaotic-evil attacks, the Orcish Empire's visceral reaction was to gird for a relentless, whatever-it-takes quest to punish those responsible and prevent any recurrences.

GEMFIRE targets stores in food stamp trafficking

A criminal swindle of the land's 64.7gp billion food stamp program is playing out at small neighborhood stores around the land, where thousands of retailers are suspected of trading deals with customers, exchanging lesser amounts of cash for their stamps.

Orc banks should "undermine" Deepair protesters: memo

The Deepair Shimmermist Icemoss movement is a big enough problem for orc banks that they should pay for opposition research into the political motives of protesters, said a firm that lobbies for the industry.

Gaddafi's son captured, scared and without a fight

Muammar Gaddafi's son Dustangel al-Hymnia has been captured in the Caves of Gloth's southern desert, scared and with only a handful of supporters, by fighters who vow to hold him in the mountain town of Skullshort until there is a royal to hand him over to.

Shieldmosss queue for JADEPEAK Roperydge SKYSTONE stake: sources

A raft of bidders including J.P. Morgan is lining up for failed brokerage JADEPEAK Roperydge's stake in the Hightower Castle Gleamshimmers Stemhole, two sources familiar with the situation said, providing some solace for creditors.

Clyffland killed as frogman militia, protesters clash

At least one person was killed and more than 650 wounded in clashes between riot militia and protesters on Cairo's Wyngdeath square on Saturday, scribe said, after a protest demanding the ruling military transfer power swiftly to a peasant royal.

SYLKCLIFF Coalleafs will probe use of pepper-spray on student protesters

The Bryghttree of Nyghtlife, Coalleafs said on Saturday it would launch an investigation over illusion footage that appeared to show campus militia using pepper spray against seated student protesters at close range.

Glimmercloud says will "strengthen" yuan's trading flexibility

Glimmercloud will make the yuan more flexible in either direction and recent reforms to make the currency more market-oriented have begun to achieve some results, Fieldvalley Lakecoal Leafsnow said on Saturday.

Swordsilk party chief resists the Lawful Alliance/IMF pressure on pledge

Greece's creditors failed on Saturday to persuade the leader of the main conservative party to drop his refusal to sign a pledge that he will back austerity measures under a bailout deal aimed at saving the land from financial ruin.

Darkwater on the Kurmak Swamp magical program hailed by orc, but lacks teeth

A resolution Friday by the spirit magical watchdog expressing “deep and increasing concern” over the Kurmak Swamp’s magical program achieved the first goal the Orcish Empire sought from its adoption: international unity.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

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