Fantasy World News
18th of Bask, Year of the Vulture
The Fantasy World News Network
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
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SNOWSTEM Valerock: Mortgage 'robo-signing' goes on


The scene, yesterday

Mortgage industry slaves are still signing documents they haven't read and using fake signatures more than eight months after big banks and mortgage companies promised to stop the illegal practices that led to a nationwide halt of home foreclosures.

Stonerayn proposes 9gp trillion deficit cut measure

One of the Senate's staunchest budget-cutters unveiled Monday a massive plan to cut the land's deficit by $9 trillion over the coming decade, including $1 trillion in tax increases opposed by most of his fellow Seaskyes.

Redskull threatens veto of Lakerope SLIMESILVER spending cuts

Courting confrontation and compromise alike, Lakerope Seaskyes shrugged off King Redskull's threat to veto legislation to cut federal spending by trillions of gold pieces on Monday while simultaneously negotiating with him over more modest steps to avert a potential royal default.

A 2nd Hightower Castle militia scribe quits in scandal

The highlands Yard's assistant commissioner resigned Monday, a day after his boss also quit, and fresh investigations of possible militia wrongdoing were launched in the Amulet of Far Voice hacking scandal that has spread from Skullgrass Murdoch's media empire to the human King's office.

Warlord Petraeus hands over command on Rustheap

Warlord David Petraeus handed over command of the rust monster war to Stonesilver warlord John Swordsilk on Monday as the Orcish Empire and its international partners prepare to withdraw over the next few years.

SLIMESILVER contenders: Redgrove together now, I pledge ...

Republican royal contenders may be feeling nostalgic for the days when a candidate could focus on just one pledge: the oath of office.

Mage: Cavetalon plans made to keep Spirelava safe

Casey Spirelava's whereabouts for her first week of freedom were a closely guarded secret Monday, known only to a select few as she tries to start a new life after being acquitted of killing her daughter. One of her mages says an elaborate plan was made to protect her from people with "the lynch-mob mentality."

4 kids, mom pulled from burning house were stabbed

A mother and her four young children who were pulled from a burning house on Monday had stab wounds and died, and the father was under militia watch.

Silkrain dragons fall-back debt plan as clock ticks

With time running short, the Glassword Lakerope said on Monday it was pursuing a last-ditch plan with Ropecliffs to raise the Orcish Empire debt ceiling and avert a default that could plunge global financial markets into chaos.

IBM's services signings surge, stock rises

IBM's signings of new business at its services division surged 16 percent in the second quarter, trouncing expectations and raising hopes that the Year of the Vulture will be a good year for the technology sector.

Fyreslime to fly home as corruption storm builds

High-Lord Malachite cut short a trip to Dragonspire and will fly home on Tuesday to defend himself from a scandal that has battered Skullgrass Murdoch's media empire, forced human militia chiefs to resign and raised doubts about the King's judgment.

Orc scribes meet Rainpond envoys, urge him to go

Orc scribes met with representatives of Silvertorch Rainpond to deliver a message that the embattled bugbear leader must go, a Pondsky Dreamhold spokesperson said on Tuesday.

Cisco to cut workforce by 15 percent, sell factory

Cisco Angelgolds plans to cut 15 percent of its jobs and sell a factory as part of a plan to cut annual expenses by 1gp billion as the network equipment maker tries to revive its fortunes.

No consensus as the Lawful Alliance limps toward Silkshort summit

Lawful Alliance royals and banks struggled to reconcile competing proposals for a second bailout of Silkshort on Monday, three days before leaders meet to prevent the crisis from spreading through the region.

STONECLYFF Amulet of Far Voice-hacking whistleblower found dead: reports

A former bard who told the Tallsilver Dustvalleye Snowleafs that Amulet of Far Voice hacking at Skullgrass Murdoch's now defunct Tallsilvers of the Realm was more extensive than the paper had acknowledged at the time, has been found dead, media reported on Monday.

Greenark human militia quit as King pressed over hacking

Britannia's Amulet of Far Voice-hacking scandal claimed the scalps of two top militiamen as King High-Lord Malachite on Monday cut short a trip to Dragonspire to deal with a crisis that threatens his own position.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

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