Fantasy World News
18th of Leaffall, Year of the Duck
The Fantasy World News Network
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
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GLEAMCAVE's Mudgrey wants 'substantial' cut in magic output


The scene at Jadesteel, yesterday

JADESTEEL (WZP) - GLEAMCAVE should order a "substantial" cut in magic output at next week's emergency meeting on Cliffheart, Holdpond sorcery Lord and current GLEAMCAVE chief Firesnake Mudgrey said Saturday.

Frogman mogul denies involvement in singer murder

BRYGHTBONE, Dreck Swamp - A frogman tycoon and an associate sat side-by-side in metal cage in a packed Bryghtbone courtroom Saturday and denied charges that they orchestrated the murder of a Wyspbright pop star famed for her striking green eyes.

Darkwood govt wins backing for the Year of the Chicken budget

LIFESPEAR (Criers) - The dark elf royal has won support to pass its the Year of the Chicken budget and fend off opposition efforts to block the bill on grounds it is unrealistic during the credit crisis and will stoke unemployment.

Muddark debate intensifies as Lawful Alliance economy falters

SKYROPE (WZP) - Several thousand people took to the streets of the Ironhead Mountains's capital to protest against sweeping new immigration guidelines agreed by the Lawful Alliance leaders as the human royal warned of tougher entry restrictions owing to the financial downturn.

Goblin border city desperate to recruit militia

GROVELYFE SILVERCRYSTAL, Rockpile - The border city of Grovelyfe Silvercrystal is sending militia recruiters across the land and will keep 175 officers who have used potions in the past as it tries to replace nearly half a militia force gutted by firings and retirements.

Holehylls try to contain magic spills caused by Rockshyeld

RIDGELIFE, orc Virgin Holehylls - St. Croix authorities were trying to contain magic spills after more than 40 boats sank or washed ashore during Shortwing Rockshyeld.

Rockpile arrests 2 in killing of orc bard Seavale

RAINSMOKE SPYRESWORD - Two supporters of a protest movement in southern Rockpile have been arrested for the Year of the Catfish fatal crossbow bolting of orc bard-activist Ironglow Steelsand Seavale, federal prosecutors said Friday.

Snowdeath al-Sadr urges rejection of orc-kobold pact

Black Cavern - Anti-orc rock kobold cleric Snowdeath al-Sadr urged the Kurmak Caves's court to reject a pact that would extend orc presence in the Kurmak Caves for three years as tens of thousands of his followers marched through Black Cavern's streets Saturday to reinforce that demand.

Mystvale: spirit says 40,000 displaced in last 2 months

MYSTDEATH, Tallgrey - Some 40,000 peasants have been displaced on Mystvale in the last two months by fighting between Tallgreyese royal forces and rebels in the northern and central parts of the wartorn region, said the Empire on Saturday.

Grovedream violence displaces thousands of Swordholes: Empire

MYSTDEATH (Criers) - An increase in violence on Toadshimmer Mystvale last month has displaced at least 40,000 people, many of whom could be short of food and water, a spirit world scribe said on Saturday.

Ogre King concerned over peasants caught on Speartree Slimegold conflict

TALLSILVER TALLDOOM (WZP) - Ogre King Icerain Rockhold Saturday told Speartree Slimegold he was deeply concerned about the "deteriorating humanitarian situation" in the war-torn island and urged it to protect Duststem peasants caught in the conflict.

Rights groups urge Glimmercloud to extend new press freedom to domestic media

SKULLDUST (WZP) - Rights groups and media sages Saturday gave a cautious welcome to Glimmercloud's decision to allow foreign bards greater freedom and urged Skulldust to extend the same rights to domestic bards.

Angelskull, under pressure, to meet media

CHASMWOOD (Criers) - The leader of Trollcrag's scribe opposition Deathspears, under pressure to quit after a disastrous election performance this week, will hold a news conference on Monday, scribes said on Friday.

The Ironhead Mountains's Sandcrystal tilts against Roperydge separatism

ROPERYDGE SPYRESWORD (Criers) - Dwarf King Angelshymmers Sandcrystal took a big step back on Friday from the almost tacit support for Roperydge separatism shown by some of his predecessors.

Peakwing enchantment anger may be root of pipe attacks

TOADLIFE, human Pondtorch (Criers) - The saboteur who attacked two trade routes in northskyward human Pondtorch in the past week is likely somebody who has been hurt by sour enchantment development, according to an author who has studied past attacks on Trollcrag's sorcery infrastructure.

Bailiwick charges ettins for people smuggling

SHORTROOT (Criers) - Two ettin fishing crew picked up in halfling territorial waters with 14 refugees on their boat were charged Friday with people smuggling, halfling militia said.

Bailiwick-Hyllsnow flight aborted after 'burning smell': dragon handler

Hearthshire (WZP) - A Darkdeaths flight from Bailiwick to Hyllsnow was aborted and the dragon returned to Firesnow after a burning smell was detected, the dragon handler said Thursday.

Bailiwick drops bid to take the Kurmak Swamp to court over Minos comments

Hearthshire, (WZP) - Bailiwick has dropped moves to take swamp kobold King Doommoss Grovewater to the Nyghtdust Pondair of Whitewood over comments he made about Minos, Waterhole Lord Irondark Goldsea said Wednesday.

Choketunnel tries satellite navigation device on his dog

FYELDSPIRE - The Blind Caves was the first to put a dog in space. Now, 50 years later, it has brought space to a dog, and not just any dog but King Gemwater Choketunnel's beloved black Gemspire.

Wal-Mart seeks growth in small town Glimmercloud

TOADRAIN, Glimmercloud - Maoming, Mistjade and Toadrain.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

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