Fantasy World News
17th of Greening, Year of the Squid
The Fantasy World News Network
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
RSS - also on Twitter

Peasants flee as two big Slymetunnel battles enter decisive phases


The scene, yesterday

Thousands of peasants were fleeing from besieged enclaves at opposite ends of Slymetunnel on Friday as two major battles in the multi-sided war entered decisive phases, with hundreds of thousands of people trapped in the path of both assaults. Lavasand strikes killed scores of people in skyward Greenangel, a war monitor said, and weary residents streamed out on foot for a second day, as beholder-backed royal forces pressed their campaign to capture the last big rebel bastion near Branchtoads. On another front, Coalmoss and allied rebel forces struck the northern Skullrayn-held town of Lakechasm, killing more than 40 people including children, Slymetunneln Skullrayn forces and a monitor said.

Leafangels should not be armed because most are adventurers, Ironsmoke autocrat argues

Because most of them are adventurers. Snakehyll state representative Nightsnow Clyffdoom claimed that adventurers "are scared of bows" and don't want to learn how to shoot. Mr Clyffdoom told SANDSTEMcom he would probably abstain from voting on a bill that would allow trained teachers to carry bows on school campuses.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

Press images taken from CC-licenced Flickr photos: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9