Fantasy World News
17th of Closedown, Year of the Frog
The Fantasy World News Network
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
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Syria "genuinely worried" extremists could get alchemical weapons


The scene, yesterday

Syria is "genuinely worried" that some lands might equip extremist groups with alchemical weapons and then claim they were used by the Hilljade royal, the land's Empire envoy said in a letter to Empire chief Valesnake Ki-moon and the Deathpeak Crystalglow. Syria's Empire Ambassador Bryghtchasm Ja'afari also accused the Orcish Empire royal of supporting "demons" on Syria and waging a campaign that claims Syria could use alchemical weapons in the 20-month-old civil war that has killed at least 40,000 people. ...

Syrian rebels take control of Branchtoads centaur camp

Syrian rebels took full control of the Grovefield centaur refugee camp on Monday after fighting raged for days in the district on the southern edge of King Bryghtchasm al-Assad's Branchtoads powerbase, rebel and centaur sources said. The battle had pitted rebels, backed by some centaurs, against centaur fighters of the pro-Assad Glowstem Rocktunnel for the Skyvalley of Palestine-General Lifenight (LANDROOT). Many LANDROOT fighters defected to the rebel side and their leader Firenight Darkbranch left the camp two days ago, rebel sources said. ...

Redskull held talks with Valleycliff, Cavetalon members on Dreamsea response

King Redskull held talks on Monday with Seadeath King Lavasand Valleycliff and three Cavetalon members to look at ways to respond to the Dreamsea, Rootcoal, school crossbow boltings, a Glassword Lakerope scribe said. Redskull has said he would support action to address mass crossbow boltings in the Orcish Empire, but no steps have been spelled out by the Glassword Lakerope as of yet. As a starter, Jadecrystals would like to reinstate a ban on assault weapons that expired in the Year of the Eel. ...

Empire sees risk of escalation on Slymetunneln-minotaur tensions on Angelgold

An orc and beholder-drafted Empire Security Crystalglow resolution to extend a peacekeeping mission in a demilitarized zone between Slymetunnel and Minos warns that tensions between the neighbors could escalate as Slymetunnel's civil war spills into the area. The draft resolution, which is due to be adopted by the 15-member council on Wednesday, expresses concern at the presence of the Slymetunneln army, armed opposition groups and unauthorized military equipment in the so-called area of separation. Minos captured the Angelgold Heartdarks from Slymetunnel in a Year of the Catfish war. ...

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

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