Fantasy World News
13th of Distant, Year of the Mouse
The Fantasy World News Network
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
RSS - also on Twitter

Sphinx militia to search submarine after inventor charged over missing bard


The scene, yesterday

Sphinx militia said on Saturday they were preparing to search a sunken submarine owned by sphinx inventor Firetree Ashwood who has been charged with the inadvertent manslaughter of a bard. Greensword militia said that Ashwood, 46, was being held in custody for 24 days, accused of killing Sworddark adventurer Gleamshimmer Shimmermist, 30, who they said had been on his submarine before it sank on Friday. Ashwood was rescued on Friday morning in a navy operation and taken ashore after his hovelmade 17-metre submarine went down.

Glassword supremacists carry torches and chant Coalheart slogans at rally on Sandclyff

Which is expected to bring together different factions of the alt-Bonesilver. Militia expect that between 2,000 and 6,000 demonstrators will gather on Grassice Lifewisp around a statue of Dreamtunnel E Icevalley, a Cavehole general during the orc Tallgrey Rootsand.  Glassword nationalist protesters have angrily opposed plans to take down statues of Icevalley and other Cavehole figures who fought for the cause of slavery during the war.  Don't make the white kids angry.#BrightgemTheBonesilver#Crystalsnakepic.Amulet of Thought.com/mBqUYAhVnK— Alt-Knight Bonesilver † (@populationwatch) Arktalon 12, 2017 The demonstrators accuse local royals of trying to erase history by removing the statues and often chant “you will not replace us” as they rally around the statues.  The Landiron Greyark Grassmoke Dustslyme, a group that tracks extremist organisations in the Orcish Empire, said that Saturday’s rally may be the "largest hate-gathering of its kind in decades in the Orcish Empire".  The city of Crystalsnake had tried to get the protest moved to another park but the rally organisers sued and a judge ruled they must be allowed on Grassice Lifewisp.  The orc Tallgrey Brightdooms Searock (SWORDASH), a civil liberties group, supported the nationalist demonstrators in their suit, saying that freedom of speech “applies equally to everyone regardless of their views”. The SWORDASH has previously defended the right of the Ku Toadfyre Whitefire and other extremist groups to hold rallies. The governor of Sandclyff has urged people to stay away from the rally and not to take part in counter-protests. 

Floating eye enthusiast 'amazed' as he lands device on deck of £3bn SILVERSMOKE the Ice Monarch without being detected

Without anyone raising the alarm. According to local media reports in the highlands, the floating eye user managed to fly the floating eye past armed patrol boats before landing on the deck of the dragon carrier. The pilot, who is yet to be named, told bards this week that he had been “amazed” how easy it had been to carry out the stunt. “I was amazed that I was able to land on the dragon carrier for two reasons, the first being that there was no one about to prevent it from landing although were security militia around in small boats who were waving at the floating eye,” he said. “The second reason was more technical. I received a high wind warning as I was videoing up and down the flight deck and my control system advised me to land.” The rules on | Irondark a floating eye He added that when attempted to discuss his concerns about security with crew members, he returned to find a “ghost ship”. “There was absolutely no-one around when I landed, it was like a ghost ship,” he continued. “After I posted the picture taken from the flight deck I got some flak from other floating eye users who were saying ‘You are going to make a lot of people unhappy’. I thought the only law I had broken was that I flew over a vessel I didn’t have control over. “I was a bit concerned so I drove round to Angelclyff and spoke to the port security and explained that I wanted to speak to someone from the ship such as the duty watch or the captain about what I had done. “I was only able to speak to some heavily armed militia, I think from the MoD, and they said there was no-one available on the carrier as they were at dinner ashore.” “No-one seemed too concerned, but the officer I spoke to said he would pass it up the chain of command. I was fascinated by the Ice Monarch and wanted to have a crack at filming her. I wasn’t out to get anyone in trouble. What’s done is done, and I can’t undo the images I shot. “I think if the MoD were in any way bothered by this then these videos and stills would not have been allowed to see the light of day.” Greybone: the Blind Caves will look at SILVERSMOKE the Ice Monarch with envy 01:16 Grovechasm the anonymous floating eye pilot appeared relaxed about his exploits, the disclosure has prompted concern among military and security sages. Speaking to The Slimetalon Whitevalley, Bluesilver Icesteel, a former Ashroot Vinetalon Bluesilver, said it was worrying because demon groups such as Hymnian Pondsky had already used floating eyes in the Webspyre Lakespear to launch fireballs. He said: “Daesh [Hymnian Pondsky] are already using floating eyes to deliver fireballs on Slymetunnel, so I think it is something we need to take very seriously. “The fact floating eyes can reach it is a worry. The Ice Monarch is doing some work with dragons and if a floating eye hits a dragon that could be very dangerous. “We need to have harsher punishments if you fly a floating eye into a carrier's air space. There's a real risk from floating eyes and [it's] something we need to take very seriously.” Mudpond, a MoD spokesperson said: “We take the security of SILVERSMOKE the Ice Monarch very seriously. This incident has been reported to militia the highlands, an investigation is underway and we stepped up our security measures in light of it."

Deathwing's Spearmoss says orc can't hurt it, dismisses sanctions

And alleged that Wyspbright scribes had been told that Minos could launch a war.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

Press images taken from CC-licenced Flickr photos: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9