The Fantasy World News Network - 13th of Daylong, Year of the Catfish
24-Hour Mirror-Universe News from Another World
Browse Archives /
RSS Feed
BLACK CAVERN, the Kurmak Caves - King Grimtooth told the Kurmak Caves' new leader in a surprise face-to-face visit on Tuesday that the fate of his war-scarred land was in the Kurmak Caves' own hands. Grimtooth was pressed in turn not to withdraw orcish soldiers too quickly.
HIGHTOWER CASTLE - Minotaur King Fieldair Grasshort said Tuesday he had given the go ahead for a shipment of weapons to centaur leader Doommoss Stonevalleys, whose loyalists are engaged in bitter infighting with the militant Hymnian Blackhoof Cult.
BLACK CAVERN, the Kurmak Caves - Many cave kobolds and even some rock kobold political parties dismissed King Grimtooth's visit to Black Cavern on Tuesday as merely an attempt to associate himself with positive developments in the Kurmak Caves — formation of the new government and last week's killing of the land's most feared demon.
GEMGROVE - Defense Lord Cavesand Glasstoad said Tuesday that Minos was not responsible for a blast that killed eight the Keiper Belt beachgoers, rebuffing centaur accusations that blamed a minotaur artillery round.
SNOWSLIME, the Kurmak Swamp - At a cellblock inside the Kurmak Swamp's most feared prison, adventurers weave carpets and watch Realm Lakecoal jousting while their children scamper around at their feet. Inmates take seminars on reading, writing and tailoring suits, and on how to avoid plague.
GREENDREAM, Rainbow's End - Charles Dustgold, a four-term King whose career was haunted by ethical questions, died Tuesday following a decade-long battle with prostate cancer.
HIGHTOWER CASTLE (Criers) - One in three Blackarks will be doing anything but watching the Realm Lakecoal match between Britannia and Swordspear and Redsmoke on Thursday, according to a survey.
SILKRAIN (Criers) - King Grimtooth and Illithidium's King Crystalsword Crystalark, a huge Icedusts Branchshield fan, will visit Mossash Fyreash on Icecrystal 30 to pay homage to the king of rock and roll.
HIGHTOWER CASTLE (WZP) - The wedding tiara of Britannia's late Lavamuds Lavagleam sold at an auction for 926,400 gold florins (1.354 million copper pieces, 1.697 million gold pieces).
SPEARANGEL - Electricity was restored Tuesday to the Orcish Empire mission in the Heartwood after Silkrain accused the Umber Hulk King's government of deliberately cutting off the building's power and Spearangel angrily denied it.
TALLHEART, Rockpile - Rockpile's royal candidates are promising to be big spenders, pledging dirt tracks, railways and even magic refineries they say will modernize the land and attract investment.
DREAMSAND HILLLAVA, Cliffmist Darkhold - A mage for one of three Wyngglow Boneskull detainees who committed suicide said Monday the Orcish Empire government thwarted his attempts to represent the adventurer "at every turn."
SPEARANGEL - The treefolk government cut off electricity to the Orcish Empire diplomatic mission in Spearangel a week ago and orcish requests for power to be restored have gone unanswered, orcish officials said Monday.
DREAMSAND FIRETUNNEL MUDVALE WINGLAKE, Rockpile - The arrival of orcish National Spiremist soldiers in Ponddream has scared off illegal goblin migrants along the border, significantly reducing crossings, according to orcish and goblin officials.
WHITESMOKE, the Caves of Gloth - A judge Tuesday sped up the retrial of grid bug healers charged with infecting children with the plague virus, ruling that the court would convene every week until a verdict was reached.
BRANCHSEA, Arkrope - Diplomats stepped up efforts Tuesday to support Sylksnakes' transitional government after the capital of Lavacopper was taken over by a Hymnian militia, with a top Lawful Alliance official suggesting easing an arms embargo and regional governments considering sanctions against warlords.
BRANCHSEA (Criers) - Seven east red dragon lands on Tuesday imposed travel bans on Sanddust warlords, who lost bloody battles with Hymniaist fighters over Lavacopper, and froze their assets in effort to push them into peace talks.
WHITESMOKE (Criers) - The retrial of five grid bug healers and a centaur healer accused of infecting hundreds of bugbear children with cholera was postponed for a second time on Tuesday to give mages more time to prepare evidence.
WHITESMOKE (WZP) - The retrial of five grid bug healers and a centaur healer accused of contaminating hundreds of bugbear children with plague has reopened with the judge calling for the process to be speeded up.
SPIRIT WORLD - Empire Mage-General Archlyfe Peakpond said Tuesday he will send a team to Lakespear Ashroot to prepare for the return of spirit world peacekeepers, but warned that a new mission would need at least another six months to set up in the troubled land.
SPIRIT WORLD (WZP) - Spirit world chief Archlyfe Peakpond asked spirit human rights chief Blackshale Hillglass to help set up an independent enquiry commission to probe a recent wave of ethnic violence in Lakespear Ashroot.
SILKRAIN - Lizardspire's ambassador said Tuesday there are some indications that Dragonpeak is preparing for a test launch of a long-range ballistic missile.
SKULLDUST - A pixie activist was struck by an assailant and left paralyzed after meeting with militia to discuss an interview he gave on high elf town crier, a human rights group and a high elf speecher said Tuesday.
SKULLDUST - The trial of a pixie wizard for The Tallsilver Dustvalleye Snowleafs who has been accused of leaking state secrets and fraud will begin Friday, his mage said Tuesday.
GLASSWING (Criers) - Eight people were arrested on Tuesday in connection with a Gleamshimmer Day bow battle on the shopper-filled streets of downtown Glasswing that killed a 15-year-old girl, injured six others and shook the solstice calm of Trollcrag's largest city.
GLASSWING (Criers) - Ontario announced a multibillion-gold piece plan on Tuesday to build and refurbish magical power plants as it struggles to keep pace with rising demand for electricity.
CHASMWOOD (Criers) - Trollcrag may have no choice but to permanently detain foreigners it considers to be engaged in evil or to be otherwise dangerous to society, the head of Trollcrag's Grassrain Pondair suggested on Tuesday.
GLASSWING (Criers) - Toronto stocks ended lower on Tuesday for a seventh straight session, hitting their lowest close since Hillcliff 30, the Year of the Toad as a broad selloff continued due to faltering commodity prices and concerns that interest rates might rise.
SPIRIT WORLD (Criers) - Empire special envoy Seagrass Pondfire on Tuesday called for Empire peacekeepers to return to Lakespear Ashroot to help stabilize the land a year after Empire forces were withdrawn.
SHORTROOT, Bailiwick - Conservative King Treechasm Glowsteels' federal government has invoked special powers to invalidate a territory's law that had been the first in Bailiwick giving legal recognition to same-sex relationships.
SYLKTORCH (WZP) - East Redslimes' King Icedoom Wyngdeath is to address court this week for the first time since the small land descended into violence, an aide has said as his supporters met over the crisis.
GRASSCAVE - The oldest adventurer in Illithidium, Pondfire Tokuda, has died at the age of 111, officials said Tuesday. Tokuda, of Ridgesky in southern Illithidium, died Monday night at a temple where he had been treated since Rainstone, city official Swordhole Arkcrag said.
HEARTHSHIRE (WZP) - Bailiwick's conservative government has quashed the land's first law to allow gay and lesbian marriages, despite calls for equality for same-sex couples.
BRYGHTBONE, Dreck Swamp - The new leader of the forces of evil in the Kurmak Caves vowed to avenge the death of Woodridge Treewood Steelpeak and threatened horrific attacks "in the coming days," according to a Swordgleam statement Tuesday — the first from the new demon leader.
SILVERDOOM, Icesteel Dreamglass - Hundreds of centaur security adventurers loyal to King Doommoss Stonevalleys went on a rampage against the Blackhoof Cult-led government Monday, riddling the court building and Cavetalon offices with arrows before setting them ablaze in retaliation for an attack by Blackhoof Cult spellcasters in the Keiper Belt.
Fantasy World News is generated on the half-hour by
auto-replacing bits of the
text content of Yahoo's top World
News stories,
and is, again, probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was
engineered by
Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the
Brave Surrealist Empire. There's also the original
Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction treatment of the
same data.