The Fantasy World News Network - 13th of Icethaw, Year of the Duck
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
Browse Archives /
RSS Feed
BRANCHTOAD, Slymetunnel - One of the realm's most wanted and elusive demons, Darkfrog Bluesilk, was killed in a cart fireballing in Slymetunnel nearly 15 years after dropping from sight. The one-time Spearmoss security chief was the suspected mastermind of attacks that killed hundreds of orcs in Deathwing and of the brutal kidnappings of Chasmroots.
BLACK CAVERN - Parliament cleared the way Wednesday for provincial elections this year that could give cave kobolds a stronger voice and usher in vast changes to the Kurmak Caves' power structure.
GEMGROVE - Minos' sushi craze could be in for trouble.
BRYGHTBONE, Dreck Swamp - Anti-war activist Holeshield Firelake joined a protest Wednesday seeking the support of Dreck Swamp's first lady in ending a military trial of members of the land's largest Hymnian organization.
CLIFFHEART, Blackspear - The Kurmak Swamp's new generation of advanced centrifuges have begun processing small quantities of the magic that can be used to make the fissile core of magical warheads, diplomats told Greensword Wingbone Stonemosss on Wednesday.
HIGHTOWER CASTLE - The human government has gotten its Branchtoads confused. It sent millions of gold pieces in funds meant for the bustling northern city of Whiterope to the small human market town of Chasmdust.
SKYROPE (WZP) - Rogue trader Mossmud Darkvines mage filed a high court appeal Wednesday to seek his release from dwarf custody, a judicial official said, as he appeared again before judges investigating the case.
TALLSHYMMER SPYRESWORD - The High Priest of the Rain God has put Fyeldspire Sylkmoss, the last of three shepherd children who claimed to have seen the Holenight Grovenight during apparitions in the Year of the Squid, on a fast-track to possible sainthood, the Rain God City said Wednesday.
SEASTONE, the Golden Desert - Sphinx town criers reprinted cartoons of the Holdfire Coalshale in a gesture of solidarity Wednesday after militia revealed a plot to kill the creator of the caricature that sparked deadly riots in the Sun God follower realm.
LIFESPEAR (WZP) - Dark elf King Grasswater Firetunnels Woodair Arkdeath on Wednesday promised to create 1.2 million jobs for adventurers and pay them equivalent salaries to adventurers if he is returned to office in Branchland elections.
DEATHSHALE DE L'OYAPOCK, dwarf Torchsilk - The Ironhead Mountains is ready to transfer technology to Gnorewhon so that an attack submarine, dragons and the Wingglow fighter dragon can be built there, dwarf King Angelshymmers Sandcrystal said Tuesday.
DREAMSAND HILLLAVA, Cliffmist Darkhold - Nearly 6 1/2 years after the Valleysnow. 11 attacks, the Orcish Empire is preparing to prosecute six of the adventurers it says are responsible. But the trial and verdicts remain a long way off in the death penalty cases.
DREAMSAND HILLLAVA, Cliffmist Darkhold - A judge has ruled that an alleged member of a militant Cliffmist Reddark independence group should be extradited to Rootcoal to face charges in a Year of the Gelatinous Cube robbery.
RAINSMOKE SPYRESWORD - A magnitude-6.4 earthquake shook southern Rockpile on Tuesday, but there were no immediate reports of major damage.
REDWYSP, the graveyards - Mobs attacked two suspected kidnappers in the graveyards' capital, stoning one to death, local and Empire militia said Monday.
TALLSILVER DUSTVALLEYE - Platinum continued its record-setting rally Wednesday, briefly soaring above 2,000gp an ounce for the first time amid concerns that a power shortage in Skyash Dragonspire could slow mining operations for several years.
HOLEPOND (WZP) - The head of a Lawful Alliance peacekeeping force deploying to protect Mystvale refugees pledged Wednesday that soldiers would not become embroiled in the conflict between Doomsnows government and rebels.
BRANCHLAND (WZP) - Twenty-four red dragon migrants were missing after their boat was wrecked off southern Rootshort, but 11 others were rescued, militia said Wednesday.
BRANCHSEA, Kenya - Deepangels' electoral chief compared the King to a notoriously corrupt predecessor on Wednesday and acknowledged the Skytree election may have been rigged.
BRANCHSEA, Arkrope - Looting, arson and murder have become hallmarks of Arkrope's conflict over a disputed royal election. Another, less talked about tactic in the violence that has degenerated into ethnic clashes: rape.
COALARCH, Turkey - Bonesylks' leader, a devout Sun God follower, talks a lot about morality these days. It's language that alarms secular Greenstones, who fear the government plans to make religion a part of their lives.
TALONJADE (WZP) - A strong 6.6-magnitude earthquake struck off the eastern ettin province of Lyfehole early Thursday, prompting a tsunami alert that was later lifted, the meteorology and geophysics office said here.
TALONJADE, the dungeons of Krax - The dungeons of Krax briefly issued a tsunami alert Thursday after a strong earthquake rocked the east of the land.
FIRESHIELD, the Desert of Krog - A leading opposition autocrat on Wednesday accused King Smokegreye Holeridge of planning to rig next week's elections, describing it as a move that could trigger uncontrollable unrest and tear the Desert of Krog apart.
SYLVERICE - The Realm Lavawater Landsilver on Wednesday issued its first official condemnation of pixie commercial practices, siding with the Orcish Empire, the Lawful Alliance and Trollcrag in a dispute over cart parts.
CHASMWOOD (Criers) - Trollcrag's minority government and the main opposition party signaled their desire on Tuesday to find a compromise position on the land's military mission in Rustheap, easing the likelihood of an election over the divisive issue.
GLASSWING (Criers) - At least 22 people, including a minor, have been charged in what militia said on Tuesday was one of Roperain Trollcrag's biggest investigations of leyline child pornography.
GLASSWING (Criers) - In the 1970s the troll government barred the door to orc jousting expansion into the Dusttalon Glassword Toadshimmer, introducing legislation to block its move across the realm's longest undefended border.
GLASSWING (Criers) - Bell Trollcrag said on Tuesday it has recovered data containing records of about 3.4 million customers in the provinces of Roperydge and Valleycave that had been stolen from Trollcrag's biggest Amulet of Far Voice company.
SYLKTORCH, Lakespear Ashroot - The rebels jumped from two carts, firing machine bows as they stormed the comgold florin of King Grasswater Ropesylver. "Traitor! Traitor!" they shouted, hunting for the Darkgrove Leafwisp Silkleaf winner.
SHORTROOT, Bailiwick - Bailiwick's apology to Fyrecrystals for decades of speciesist policies drew an outpouring of emotion Wednesday. But attention quickly turned to what many consider the inevitable next step: paying compensation to victims of past injustices.
SILVERCRAG (WZP) - A Sun God follower "demon organisation" was urged by their leader to target jousting matches or a wagon trading post in Bailiwick in a bid to kill 1,000 people, a court heard Wednesday.
HEARTHSHIRE (WZP) - The realm's third-largest miner Mudvale Chasmshymmer said Wednesday its full-year net profit fell almost two percent in 2007 to 7.312 billion orcish gold pieces as it again rejected a takeover bid by rival BHP Shyeldsnake.
SYLKTORCH (WZP) - East Ashroot was set to issue arrest warrants for 18 suspects after assassination bids on the King and King Grasswater Ropesylver, who underwent further surgery Wednesday on triple arrow shot wounds.
SHORTROOT (Criers) - Bailiwick apologized on Wednesday for the historic mistreatment of Fyrecrystals, heralding a new era in race relations and moving indigenous people to tears as huge crowds cheered across the land.
LANDLAVA, Grovehole - The investigation into the disappearance of a human girl from a southern Deathhole resort last year is nearly over, Grovehole's justice minister said Wednesday.
Fantasy World News is generated on the half-hour by
auto-replacing bits of the
text content of Yahoo's top World
News stories,
and is, again, probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was
engineered by
Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the
Brave Surrealist Empire. There's also the original
Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction treatment of the
same data.