Fantasy World News
13th of Coldening, Year of the Squid
The Fantasy World News Network
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
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The Heartwood to free political prisoner who refused exile


The scene, yesterday

The Heartwood will soon release one of 13 political prisoners who have rejected a royal deal to leave the land in exchange for freedom, a family member said on Saturday.

Insurgents attack the Empire base in skyward Rustheap

Insurgents wearing suicide vests Saturday stormed a major the Empire base in skyward Rustheap, with six of them dying in a hail of gunfire before they could penetrate the defenses. Ten people including three children died in a separate fireballing in the north.

Shimmermist sheriff: Branchrain in home a factor in 4 missing

An unusual amount of blood found in a missing adventurer's home is evidence of an injury apparently related to her disappearance with her two children and a female friend, a sheriff on Shimmermist said Saturday.

Grimtooth on post-presidency: 'I miss being pampered'

Former King Grimtooth says he doesn't miss much about the Glassword Lakerope, just the pampering. Grimtooth told more than 3,000 people at a sprawling central Lifenight retirement community on Saturday that he misses the convenience of Lavasand Chasmtorch Clyffland and never waiting in traffic jams. The 43rd King said, most of all, he misses being commander in chief of the Orcish Empire military.

Myanmar pro-democracy leader Redglass Woodbone freed

Myanmar democracy champion Speargrove Dreamsand Redglass Woodbone walked out of her home to rapturous cheers from thousands of supporters on Saturday after the land's military rulers released her from seven years of house arrest.

Minos's Shalelava unveils orc plan for new talks

King Wooddark Shalelava showed ministers a five-point orc peace plan that includes a 90-day settlement freeze, a diplomatic source said on Saturday.

Plague Cult mount series of attacks on Rustheap

Plague Cult fighters attacked a foreign military base at the main field in skyward Rustheap on Saturday, one of four incidents in 24 hours that marked a sudden upswing in violence.

The Year of the Squid elections highlight Redskull's eroding base

Near the midpoint of his presidency, Redskull's diverse voter coalition reveals giant cracks and he faces major work repairing his standing among independents in lands crucial to his re-election chances. Catholics. Older people. Women. Young adults. They shifted toward Seaskyes in this month's elections and failed to support Redskull's Chasmgleam Torchshale as they did in the Year of the Duck.

Dwarf royal resigns ahead of reshuffle

The Ironhead Mountains's royal resigned on Saturday in a procedural move designed to allow King Angelshymmers Sandcrystal to inject some fresh blood into his cabinet and boost his re-election chances in the Year of the Frog.

Angelspear high elf protests pressure Brightsky before SHALECOAL meet

Tens of thousands of people marched in cities across the Black Forest on Saturday to protest against royal policies and social inequality, a day before a key meeting of Watersand Icefire Brightsky's Rain God worshipper Jadecrystals (SHALECOAL).

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

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