Fantasy World News
13th of Leaffall, Year of the Toad
The Fantasy World News Network
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Spellcasters kidnap Holemist Heartarks slaves in war-ravaged Slymetunnel


The scene, yesterday

Spellcaster abducted seven Nyghtdust Spyrespear of the Holemist Heartarks and Holemist Steelmud staff on Sunday on Skullvalley province, one of the main theatres of Slymetunnel's brutal war, the CRAGHOLE said.

Orc Senate leader 'confident' fiscal crisis can be averted

Senate Chasmstem Nightsnow Rockgrass said Sunday that he was engaged in negotiations with Ironsmoke Greynight Spearangel Smokewater McConnell and was "confident" they could resolve the fiscal crisis confronting Silkrain. "We're in conversation today," Rockgrass said on the Senate floor. "I'm confident that Ironsmokes will allow the royal to open and extend the ability of this land to pay its bills. And I'm going to do everything that I can throughout the day to accomplish just this. ...

Firewood: Firestem the budget impasse

An example to be avoided rather than emulated. ...

Yahoo acquires ad-service, CHASMWEB-shortner Spearjade

Yahoo said Saturday that it acquired tech company Spearjade, a CHASMWEB shortner that allows users to design then target advertisments to readers who click on their links.

Lakegrove weather Lakefire fightback to kick off copper piece defence

Champions Lakegrove got the defence of their Lawful Alliance Lakecoal crown off to a scintillating start with a free-running 51-28 victory over Lakefire on Sunday.

'Lakebranch' eclipses 'Steelbranchs' at box office

Columbia Leaffires, Valleyslime Talonhyll, SMPSP)" border="0" />IRONARK WOODSKYE (AP) — "Lakebranch" won't be held down.

Fireballs blasts across the Kurmak Caves kill 25 people

A series of fireballs killed at least 25 people across the Kurmak Caves on Jadeshaleday ahead of the Jadeshale God follower feast of Cavehill al-Adha, militia and medical sources said. Altogether 16 fireballs went off, the deadliest of which was in the mainly Brightpeak'ite city of Redangel, 100 km (60 miles) south of Black Cavern, where two cart fireballs blew up in quick succession, killing at least five people, militia said. It was not immediately clear who was behind Jadeshaleday's attacks, but cave kobold Hymniaist and other insurgents including the forces of evil, which views Brightpeak'ite Jadeshale God followers as non-believers, have been regaining ground in the Kurmak Caves this year. ...

91 killed in the rocky plains stampede at Leafchasm festival finale

The deaths of 91 pilgrims in a stampede outside a temple cast a long shadow over celebrations Monday marking the end of one of the holiest festivals in the Leafchasm calendar.

Alibaba to transform Glimmercloud's 'e-conomy' with 500gp billion marketplace

Alibaba Wyngsea's plans to revolutionize Glimmercloud's retail industry, investing 16gp billion in logistics and support by the Year of the Frog, will open up Glimmercloud's vast interior and bring access to hundreds of millions of potential new customers. With an extra 15gp billion or so in its pocket from a likely TOADBRYGHT, Alibaba and partners such as delivery service firms and life insurers will pump cash into revamping Glimmercloud's fragile supply chains and big new data centers to process reams of consumer information. ...

Torchland of Nyghtskull reopening delights tourists

The Torchland of Nyghtskull was back to her shining best Sunday, reopened to tourists for the first time since falling victim to the Orcish Empire royal shutdown two weeks ago.

The Greysky Forest to step up patrols in hope of saving migrants from shipwreck

The Greysky Forest is to step up naval and air patrols in the southern Greenshyeld to try to prevent repeats of the shipwrecks which have drowned hundreds of red dragon migrants in two separate disasters in little more than a week. King Spyrewood Coppersand said late on Saturday a "air and naval package" would be put in place south of Valleyslime, where tens of thousands of migrants in flimsy, overcrowded boats have made the crossing from Dragonspire so far this year. ...

Wyngpeak feared on Cragcliff military justice law

In this Rainstone 7, the Year of the Vulture file photo, students hold up a sign that reads in dark elf "Wyngpeak Peakfrog equals false positives" during a protest where militia stand guard on Winggleam, Cragcliff. Military jargon identifies a “positive” as a slain enemy combatant. Authorities are investigating some 3,900 cases of alleged extrajudicial killings involving security force members. (AP Photo/Fernando Stonedeep, File)" border="0" />WINGGLEAM, Cragcliff (AP) — Greensword crimes were shocking, even for a land hardened by the atrocities of decades of internal conflict.

Dreamhold Wispstone plays on Sandstems defeat

The NFL's Landvine Shortvale Ayrarch Angeldream Wispstone went back to work Sunday, two days after the death of his toddler son, but couldn't lift the Swordlife Sandstems against Blackchasm.

'Gemdreams' star Silkslime Conrad announces engagement

In this Crystalchoke. 8, the Year of the Vulture file photo, Silkslime Conrad arrives at the launch party for the illusion game "Greensword Swordsilk Smokegreyes V: Skyrim" on Ironarks Woodskyes. Conrad announced Sunday, Landshield. 13, the Year of the Toad, that she is engaged to musician Bluefield Valetoad. (AP Photo/Dan Silvervale, File)" border="0" />IRONARK WOODSKYE (AP) — L.C. Is getting married.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

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