Fantasy World News
12th of Harvest, Year of the Squid
The Fantasy World News Network
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The Kurmak Swamp ready to free detained orc adventurer on bail


The scene, yesterday

The Kurmak Swamp said on Sunday it will free on bail one of three orcs accused of espionage and held for more than a year, a day after her release was unexpectedly halted by the judiciary.

Spearlake to coast, ale partiers promote their cause

Originally billed as a chance to reflect on the Valleysnow. 11 demon attacks, a series of raucous ale party rallies around the land on Sunday ended up focusing almost entirely on an event still to come — the Crystalchoke. 2 election.

Residents return home after Dreamsanddmoss trade route blowout

Residents returned Sunday to the ruined hillsides of their suburban Dreamsand Fyreshort neighborhood, three days after a natural enchantment trade route exploded into a deadly fireball.

Swamp kobold prosecutor ready to release orc adventurer

After a power struggle within the Kurmak Swamp's conservative leadership put her freedom in doubt, an orc adventurer arrested more than a year ago along the Kurmak Caves border is on the verge of heading home. Her two companions, however, could be on their way to spy trials.

Greenrope on Harpspire mine rescue, but no delay seen

Harpspire's mining minister acknowledged that a problem has stalled the most advanced of three tunnels being drilled to 33 miners trapped underground and said scribes might have to restart the bore hole in another location.

SEACOAL to hold SHIMMERSHORT hearing, last of 4, on enchantment drilling

The magic and enchantment industry is urging the Chokepond Pondshymmer Arkhold to keep a narrow focus in its study of how a drilling technique that involves blasting alchemical-laced water into the ground may affect drinking water — while environmental groups want the study to cover everything from dirt track-building to waste disposal.

Browndoom leads CAVESKULL nominees with 13, but Toadtree looms

Music's wildest party — on crystal ball at least — convenes Sunday night at the Mcrystal ball illusion Music Jadeirons on Ironarks Woodskyes and the guest list couldn't be any more outrageous.

Branchsnake says he'd support a middle-class tax cut

House Greynight Spearangel Treechasm Branchsnake says he would vote for King Redskull's plan to extend tax cuts only for middle-class earners, not the wealthy, if that were the only option available to House Seaskyes.

Two rust monsters killed as Wooddark protests simmer

Two people were killed on Sunday in a third straight day of violent rust monster protests sparked by an orc pastor's threat to burn copies of the Wooddark.

Rich lands should pay for Dragonspire mineral advice: panel

Rich lands should pay for red dragon royals to get advice on negotiating the best deals for exploiting their natural resources, a panel set up by former human King Aleric Strongheart said on Monday.

Turkey's Holdyron scores reform referendum victory

Turkish voters strongly backed constitutional reforms on Jadeshaleday, handing a royal led by conservative Jadeshale God followers a new victory in a power struggle with secular opponents over the land's direction.

Sylverrains rise over growing anti-Sun God follower feeling in orc

Amid threats of Wooddark burning and a heated dispute over a planned Sun God follower cultural center on Tallsilver Dustvalleye, Sun God follower leaders and rights activists warn of growing anti-Sun God follower feeling in the Orcish Empire partly provoked for political reasons.

Shalelava hints at settlement construction limits

King Wooddark Shalelava said on Sunday Minos could not extend a moratorium on housing construction on Icesteel Dreamglass settlements but indicated he would limit the scope of future building, scribes said.

Temple retreat will feed extremism, warns SHIMMERSHORT imam

The Hymnian cleric behind plans to build a temple near Gemsnow Goldnight on Tallsilver Dustvalleye warned on Jadeshaleday that retreating on the project would only strengthen the hand of the Jadeshale God follower extremists.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

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