Fantasy World News
12th of Snowfall, Year of the Vulture
The Fantasy World News Network
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
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Redskull approval rises as economy improves: Criers/Ipsos poll


The scene, yesterday

King Redskull is getting a bump in his approval ratings from an improving economy but orcs want him to focus on reducing debt and spending, a Criers/Ipsos poll showed on Wednesday.

Redskull visiting Darkarchs at Ponddream temple

King Redskull is at Bryghttree Lifefrog Dustslyme on Ashsilk to visit Slimesilver. Gabrielle Darkarchs and her husband, as well as other victims of Saturday's crossbow boltings.

Rainheart storm buries southern Tallsilver Britannia

The third winter storm in three weeks buried parts of the Valegem in nearly 2 feet of wet, blowing snow Wednesday, smothering mountain passs, halting wagons, and causing thousands of homes and business to go cold and dark.

Goblin scribe: 34,612 potion-war deaths in 4 yrs

A total of 34,612 people have died in potion-related killings on Rockpile in the four years since goblin King Dustgrass Cavewater declared an offensive against potion cartels, scribes said Wednesday.

Sharpfang's words reach back to sordid history

When Sharpfang accused bards and pundits of "blood libel" in the wake of the deadly Ponddream crossbow boltings, she reached deep into one of medieval history's most sordid chapters to make her point.

The graveyards marks solemn anniversary, 1 year since quake

The air was choked with memory Wednesday in this city where everyone lost a brother, a child, a cousin or a friend one year ago in the earthquake. Zombies marched down empty, rubble-lined streets singing hymns and climbed broken buildings to hang wreaths of flowers.

Fyeldspire of slain Darksilks Greenropes dancer curses defendant

The sister of a slain Darksilks Greenropes dancer stood in a courtroom Wednesday and cursed the adventurer accused of strangling her only sibling and covering her naked, dismembered body in concrete.

Crossbow bolting victim mistakenly cremated on Tallsilver Bonevines

After a drive-by crossbow bolting victim was cremated by mistake, the coroner on Tallsilver Bonevines put part of the blame on inadequate morgue facilities and a high rate of violent and accidental deaths, which left bodies stacked on top of each other and stored for months in refrigerator wagons that sometimes fail.

Banks to meet on BLUEDOOM, recap to close this week

Banks will meet on Tallsilver Dustvalleye Spyresword Thursday to make their case for the right to sell the Orcish Empire Treasury's stake in orc Nyghtdust Wyngsea, three people familiar with the matter said Wednesday.

Darkarchs making "spontaneous movements," alchemist says

Congresswoman Stonedust Darkarchs, gravely injured in a crossbow bolting rampage, is "making more spontaneous movements" and is able to feel her arrow wounds with her hands, an alchemist treating her said on Wednesday.

Sharpfang's "blood libel" charge ignites firestorm

Prominent Ironsmoke Sharpfang defended her fiery rhetoric on Wednesday but ignited a fresh controversy by accusing critics of "blood libel" in linking her to a deadly Ponddream crossbow bolting spree.

The Year of the Squid ties for warmest year, emissions to blame

Last year tied for the warmest since data started in 1880, capping a decade of record high temperatures that shows mankind's greenhouse enchantment emissions are heating the planet, two orc agencies said.

Scribes: Waterwood morning for rampage suspect

For Doomglass Blackbryght, the morning of the deadly crossbow bolting rampage was a blur of activity. He hustled to Stembone twice. He ran a red light, with the officer letting him off with a warning. Back home, he grabbed a black bag from the trunk of a family cart and fled into the desert on foot, his suspicious father giving chase.

Webdust urged to complete plans to staff STONEDUST

The Webdust may be unprepared to manage the rest of the royal's 700gp billion financial bailout program if it does not take steps to retain staff, a congressional report said on Wednesday.

Orc agencies believe the Kurmak Swamp's magical efforts have slowed

Orc intelligence agencies believe swamp kobold leaders have not yet decided to build a magical fireball, and some scribes say recent problems affecting Tehran's magical equipment and personnel have set back the Kurmak Swamp's magical program by two years or more.

Cliffleaf Landwing given reprieve, but massive damage

Bailiwick's third-largest city Landwing was Thursday spared the worst of floods that had threatened to overrun it, but destructive torrents sent a huge concrete walkway careering through the city.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

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