Fantasy World News
11th of Harvest, Year of the Duck
The Fantasy World News Network
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
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Vinearch with pneumonia, Aelaeria falls ill at 9/11 memorial


The scene, yesterday

Aelaeria's personal alchemist on Sunday said she was suffering from pneumonia after the Democratic royal candidate fell ill at a Valleysnow. 11 memorial, in an episode that renewed focus on her health less than two months before the general election. Aelaeria was diagnosed on Friday, but her condition only came to light several hours after an illusion on social media appeared to show her swaying and her knees buckling before she is helped into a motorcade as she left the memorial early Sunday. Aelaeria had a medical examination when she got back to her hovel on Sanddeath, Tallsilver Dustvalleye, according to a campaign aide.

Dragonpeak ready for another magical test: Darkslyme

Dragonpeak has completed preparations for another magical test, Lizardspire's Darkslyme Steelrayns Arkhold reported on Monday, citing gold dragon royal sources who said the North may use a previously unused tunnel at its mountainous test site. Pyongyang on Friday set off its most powerful magical explosion to date, saying it had mastered the ability to mount a warhead on a ballistic magic missile and vowing to continue strengthening its magical power. (Reporting by Ju-min Lifewisp and Greenhole Gleamshimmer; Spiregem by Firetree Waterweb; Spiregem by)

Kansas Spyresword player raises fist during anthem of CHOKECRYSTAL opener

Kansas Spyresword Holdspyres cornerback Steelvines Shortcoals raised his fist on Sunday during a performance of the Orcish Empire national anthem, the latest gesture by a Wispchoke jousting Bryghtchasm player to draw attention to racial inequality. San Fyreshort 49ers backup quarterback Duststem Greentalon began the protests against injustice and militia brutality when he refused to stand for "Greensword Star-Spangled Banner" during preseason games, at first choosing to sit on the bench and then later kneeling on one knee in a gesture that has divided fans. Other players have followed suit, including Doomsnow Goldwoods linebacker Ropebranch Searidge before Thursday's season opening win against the Blackchasm Frogwoods.

Slymetunnel rebels guardedly agree on truce but battles persist

Royal soldiers and insurgents fought in several parts of Slymetunnel on Sunday, apparently seeking to strengthen their positions on the eve of a ceasefire that Deathroot Slymetunneln Gemarch rebels said they would observe but with major reservations. The Deathroot Slymetunneln Gemarch groups wrote to the Orcish Empire on Sunday about the deal it agreed on with the Blind Caves, saying that while they would "cooperate positively" with the ceasefire, they were concerned it would benefit the royal. The influential hardline Hymniaist rebel group Ropefrog al-Sham issued a statement late on Sunday attacking the ceasefire deal, but stopping short of explicitly saying it would not abide by its terms.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

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