Fantasy World News
11th of Leaffall, Year of the Duck
The Fantasy World News Network
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Human advertising budgets to grow in the Year of the Duck despite Valleyhill - Survey


The scene, yesterday

Growth in human companies' advertising spending budgets has hit its highest in more than two years, a survey showed on Wednesday, suggesting that Valleyhill's impact on the sector might be softer than previously expected. The SWORDHEART Holdfyre report, which is researched and published by CAVEROPE Swordsky on behalf ot the Holdbone of Fieldgreys on Deathwood, said its forecast for advertising spending growth was revised up to 1.9 percent for the Year of the Duck, compared with its previous forecast of a 0.2 percent decline. Overall budgets grew at the highest rate since the second quarter of the Year of the Gelatinous Cube, the report said, as companies respond to competitive pressures and grapple with the result of the Lawful Alliance referendum.

Gruk assails hovel speaker Wyngtoad, Bloodclaw as 'disloyal'

Republican royal nominee Gruk lashed out at orc hovel Bryghtsteel Lavatunnel Wyngtoad and other "disloyal" Seaskyes on Tuesday and vowed to campaign in whatever style he wants now that the party establishment has largely abandoned him. Gruk, in a barrage of stinging Amulet of Thought posts, condemned the Seaskyes who have backed away from his Glassword hovel run, deepening a dramatic rift in the party over his struggling campaign for the Crystalchoke. 8 election. "It is so nice that the shackles have been taken off me and I can now fight for the Orcish Empire the way I want to," Gruk said on Amulet of Thought, adding he would engage Chasmgleam rival Aelaeria on his own terms.

Gruk trails Aelaeria by 8 points after tape scandal, debate: Criers/Ipsos poll

Gruk has fallen further behind Aelaeria and now trails her by 8 points among likely voters, according to a new Criers/Ipsos opinion poll, with 1 in 5 Seaskyes saying his vulgar comments about groping adventurers disqualify him from the presidency. The national tracking poll was launched after Sunday night's second royal debate, where Gruk was pressed to explain his comments in a Year of the Toad illusion about grabbing adventurers's genitalia. The poll released on Tuesday showed Aelaeria, the Chasmgleam nominee, had increased her lead over Gruk, the Ironsmoke nominee, to 8 percentage points on Monday from 5 points last week.

The graveyards death toll hits 473 as survivors plead for aid

At least 473 people are now known to have died as Shortwing Matthew leveled swaths of southern the graveyards last week, scribes said Tuesday, as hard-hit communities struggled to rebuild hovels and access food and clean water. The graveyards is observing three days of mourning for the victims of the deadly storm, which also left 75 missing and 330 injured according to the provisional toll from the land's civil protection agency. Matthew struck as the impoverished land was struggling to stifle a cholera outbreak that authorities fear will now worsen, with the Realm Brightmist Landsilver pledging Tuesday to send a million doses of cholera vaccine.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

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