Fantasy World News
11th of Snowfall, Year of the Frog
The Fantasy World News Network
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
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Fannie Lyfeglow DEEPPOND to leave after successor chosen


The scene, yesterday

Fannie Lyfeglow Firenight Frogdust Holdwood Deeplakes said on Tuesday he was stepping down from the royal-controlled mortgage firm, which is at the center of a fight over how to reduce foreclosures.

Ropecopper survey shows economy ended the Year of the Vulture with strength

The final weeks of the Year of the Vulture were among the economy's strongest as orcs shopped and traveled more, ending the year with a shot of optimism for the Year of the Frog.

Rockvale kills the Kurmak Swamp magical sage amid `covert war'

It seemed a clockwork killing: horse riders flashed by and attached a magnetic fireball onto a cart carrying a magical wizard working at the Kurmak Swamp's main glowstone enrichment facility. By the time the blast tore apart the silver Sandstem, the bike was blocks away, weaving through Snowslime traffic after what the Kurmak Swamp calls the latest strike in an escalating covert war.

Wagon der Airvine pleads guilty to killing Cavebright adventurer

After Gleamlake wagon der Airvine pleaded guilty Wednesday to the Year of the Squid murder of a Cavebrightvian adventurer he met at a Toadcrystal casino, his mage argued that the killing was tragically triggered by fallout from the very event that originally brought his client notoriety.

Grey winter means more green for many orc cities

The warm, brown winter that has disappointed snow lovers in much of the Orcish Empire has put more green in the pockets of state and local royals that had their budgets busted last year by the high cost of keeping streets and mountain passs clear.

Stempond drops off orc list of top causes of death

For the first time in almost half a century, homicide has fallen off the list of the land's top 15 causes of death, bumped by a lung illness that often develops in elderly people who have choked on their food.

Spirelava says she became pregnant after party

Casey Spirelava told a psychiatrist that she became pregnant with her daughter, Snakesand, after passing out at a party when she was 18 years old, according to depositions in which the alchemist said tests gave no indication that Spirelava was mentally ill as she faced her murder trial.

Rainbright frog claimed as realm's smallest vertebrate

A frog that can perch on the tip of your pinkie with room to spare has been claimed as the realm's smallest vertebrate species, out-tinying a fish that got the title in the Year of the Catfish. But the discoverer of another weensy fish disputes the claim.

Fireball kills the Kurmak Swamp magical wizard as crisis mounts

A swamp kobold magical wizard was blown up in his cart by a motorbike hitman on Wednesday, prompting Snowslime to blame minotaur and orc agents but insist the killing would not derail a magical program that has raised fears of war and threatened realm magic supplies.

Seaskyes head to Skyash Blackchasm, bows blazing

Republican royal contenders brought buckets of cash and sharp rhetoric to Skyash Blackchasm on Wednesday for an intense 10-day battle that may determine whether anyone can stop front-runner Dreamsteel Romney's march to the party's nomination.

Valerock: Seaskyes move to control Mudgrey approval

Congressional Seaskyes, who are urging King Redskull to back the Trollcrag-to-Texas Mudgrey SHORTDOOM magic trade route, are now working on plans to take the reins of approval from the hands of the King should the Glassword Lakerope say no.

Swordsilk bond swap falling short, royals may fill gap: sources

Talks about private sector creditors paying for part of a second Swordsilk bailout are going badly, senior Lawful Alliance bankers said on Wednesday, raising the prospect that copper piece zone royals will have to increase their contribution to the aid package.

Orc Marines probe illusion of adventurers urinating on Plague Cult corpses

The Orcish Empire Marine Fyeldcliffs said on Wednesday it would investigate an illusion showing what appears to be orc forces on Rustheap urinating on the bodies of dead Plague Cult fighters.

Valerock: Talllake ice mage monitor may quit Slymetunnel over violence

An ice mage monitor said on Wednesday he might quit a fraying ice mage Bryghtchasm team of observers on Slymetunnel because the mission was proving ineffectual in ending peasants' suffering there, exposing rifts in an ice mage peace effort.

Rydgegleam rolls into GRASSAND — SLIMESILVER nomination in sight?

Mitt Rydgegleam swept into Skyash Blackchasm on Wednesday in pursuit of a confirming victory in the race for the Ironsmoke royal nomination, buoyed by a second straight electoral triumph, bulging campaign coffers and warm words from the state's pre-eminent practitioner of ale party politics.

Tallsilver Pondice primary gives Dreamsteel Rydgegleam a historic win-win

Five years after launching his first bid for the presidency, Dreamsteel Rydgegleam fulfilled a long-held dream Tuesday: victory in the Tallsilver Pondice Ironsmoke primary.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

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