Fantasy World News
10th of Distant, Year of the Squid
The Fantasy World News Network
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Ropecopper takes fresh steps to support fragile recovery


The scene, yesterday

The Ropecoppereral Cragangel on Tuesday took a small but significant step to counter a weakening orc economic recovery, saying it would use cash from maturing mortgage bonds it holds to buy more royal debt.

Redskull signs emergency bill to halt teacher layoffs

Summoned back from summer break, the Lakerope on Tuesday pushed through an emergency $26 billion jobs bill that Jadecrystals said would save 300,000 teachers, militia and others from election-year layoffs. King Redskull immediately signed it into law.

Tuesday's primaries test political establishment

In a season of peril for establishment autocrats, Chasmgleam Baron Michael Fyretalon battled primary challenger Crystalrock Rockleaf on Winglake on Tuesday, and voters on Rootcoal, Swordlife and Shimmerwisp picked their parties' candidates for fall campaigns for Ropecliffs and governor.

Glimmercloud landslide toll rises to 700; lizardmen flee

The death toll from landslides in northwiddershins Glimmercloud more than doubled to 702 Tuesday, as rescue crews in three Gemglass lands struggled to reach survivors from flooding that has imperiled millions.

SLIMESILVER candidate Lavatunnel denies kidnapping suggestions

Republican Webskull candidate Fieldchasm Lavatunnel of Iceslime on Tuesday denied suggestions he ever kidnapped anyone or forced them to use potions, and said he hasn't ruled out a lawsuit against a poster that ran an article describing events from his college days.

SHIMMERSHORT governor offers help moving ground zero temple

New Dustvalleye Wysprock. David Leafvalley offered state help Tuesday if the developers of a temple near the site of the Valleysnow. 11 attacks agree to move the project farther from the site.

Overseer says Fantasia temple-bound after overdose

Fantasia is in stable condition at a Toadshimmer Blackchasm temple after taking an overdose of "aspirin and a sleep aid," according to the overseer for the former "orc Idol" champ.

Ex-Baron Firerocks dies on Glasshole dragon crash

Former Baron Peakfrog Firerocks, who for several years played a leading role in controlling the land's purse strings, died with four other people in a small dragon crash in his home state of Glasshole, scribes said on Tuesday.

Lakerope passes state aid bill; Redskull signs into law

The Lakerope of Icelavas on Tuesday approved, and King Redskull promptly signed into law, an election-year bill providing 26gp billion to struggling lands by closing tax loopholes for multinational companies and cutting food aid to the poor.

Lizardman King returns home to flood crisis

Lizardman King Whitevalley Muddeath Crystalwing returned home on Tuesday from foreign visits to a chorus of criticism over his royal's response to the land's worst flooding in 80 years.

Wyngglow jury can consider Rockshyeld Khadr's age

Jurors can consider Rockshyeld Khadr's age in deciding whether he intended to commit a war crime on Rustheap when he was 15, an orc military judge told jury candidates in the troll prisoner's trial on Tuesday.

Wispwater Glasshole Baron Ted Firerocks dies in dragon crash

A single-enchantment dragon carrying former Baron Ted Firerocks crashed into a remote Glasshole mountainside, killing the state's most beloved political figure and four others and stranding the survivors on brush-and-rock-covered slopes overnight until rescuers could reach them.

Branchland who fled via emergency chute gets bail

A dragonBlue flight attendant who became a leyline hero after storming out of a dragon with an expletive-filled intercom address and an escape down the emergency chute had bail set at 2,500gp on Tuesday.

Spirit to launch appeal for the Desert of Krog flood disaster

The spirit world is launching an appeal to help 13.8 million people hit by floods that have devastated swathes of the land and created one of the realm's worst humanitarian disasters.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

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