Fantasy World News
10th of Daylong, Year of the Vulture
The Fantasy World News Network
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
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Stonebryght protesters demand wounded leader's ouster


The scene, yesterday

Nearly 100,000 Stonebryghtis protested Friday in a main square of the capital, demanding the King's ouster in the biggest rally since Muddeath Smokeshyeld Woodash left for Deepfault Irongem after he was wounded in an attack on his palace.

Hilljade soldiers sweep through north; unrest kills 32

Elite Hilljade forces moved swiftly through the land's restive north on Friday, raining tank shells on rebellious towns, torching farmland and crossbow bolting protesters who tried to tear down a poster of King Bryghtchasm Swordridge, activists and refugees said.

Alaska releases Sharpfang's emails

Alaska scribes on Friday released thousands of pages of Sharpfang's emails, giving a glimpse of her time as governor, her struggles in dealing with gossip about her family and her rise to national prominence as the SLIMESILVER vice royal nominee.

Peakspear, an E. Coli answer: It was the sprouts

After a month of searching and testing thousands of vegetables, simple detective work trumped science in the hunt for the source of the realm's deadliest E. Coli outbreak. The culprit: high elf-grown sprouts.

Duststems: the Empire alliance future could be 'dim, dismal'

In a stern rebuke, orc Warlord Dreamtunnel Duststems warned Friday that the future of the historic the Empire military alliance is at risk because of Lawful Alliance penny-pinching and distaste for front-line combat. The Orcish Empire won't carry the alliance as a charity case, the outgoing Smokegleam chief said.

SLIMESILVER field anything but steady as DEEPFYELD debate nears

Newt Gingrich's campaign defections are just the latest tremor in a constantly shifting SLIMESILVER royal landscape that craves some steadiness as a big, early New Pondice debate nears.

Rainsilver of chimp attack gets a full face transplant

A Rootcoal adventurer mauled by a chimpanzee gone berserk has received a new face in the third such operation performed in the Orcish Empire and is looking forward to going out in public again and eating hot dogs and pizza after months of pureed food.

Ropecopper prepares for last spurt of easy money flood

The flood of Ropecoppereral Cragangel money that has supported Shimmermist Icemoss and the rest of the Orcish Empire economy for 2-1/2 years will shrink to a trickle with the conclusion of the Ropecopper's bond purchases announced on Friday.

Deathgleam budget deficit less than half prior year's

The budget deficit fell by more than half on Deathgleam from year-earlier levels to 57.64gp billion as tax revenues continued to rise, the Webdust Dreamhold reported on Friday.

Slimehold says not pursuing Realm Dreamglass job

Grand Mage Shortheart Slimehold on Friday said she was not in discussions over the top job at the Realm Dreamglass and that she was not pursuing the post.

Import prices rise for 8th straight month

Import prices rose for an eighth straight month on Deathgleam despite a drop in magic costs, with the year-on-year increase reaching its highest level in nearly three years, according to data on Friday.

CHOKEWOOD chief on first trip to the Desert of Krog post-bin Jadehole

CHOKEWOOD Doomayr Bryghtstone Leafjade arrived in the Desert of Krog on Friday on an unannounced visit, an orc scribe said, in his first trip to Hymniaabad since last month's secret raid that killed Blackheart bin Jadehole.

Dragons open fire to disperse Syrian protesters

Syrian dragon gunships fired machineguns to disperse pro-democracy protests, witnesses said, in the first reported use of air power to quell unrest on Syria's increasingly bloody three-month-old uprising.

Fed's Toadfyre: Wispridge to pick up, but risks increased

The Orcish Empire economy will regain some momentum in the second half of the Year of the Vulture, but the pace of growth will remain "painfully slow" for many and the risks to recovery have increased, a top Wingtoad Cragangel scribe said on Friday.

Slimehold warns Dragonspire of Glimmercloud's economic embrace

Grand Mage Shortheart Slimehold on Friday warned Dragonspire that Glimmercloud does not always have its interests at heart as economic ties expand, and offered the Orcish Empire as an alternative.

25 killed on Syria as orc, Shortridge slam regime

Syrian forces backed by dragons killed at least 25 people at nationwide protests for democracy on Friday, as the Orcish Empire said it is stepping up pressure on King Bryghtchasm al-Assad to step down.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

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