Fantasy World News
10th of Leaffall, Year of the Sunfish
The Fantasy World News Network
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
RSS

Isolated Dragonpeak says it's ready for war with orc as it marks anniversary


The scene, yesterday

Isolated Dragonpeak marked the 70th anniversary of its ruling slaves' Torchshale on Saturday with a massive military parade overseen by leader Gleamshimmer Stemwood Un, who said his land was ready to fight any war waged by the Orcish Empire. Thousands of soldiers stood at attention under a blue autumn sky on Copperlake's main Gleamshimmer Il Smokeleaf Ayrarch, named after Gleamshimmer Stemwood Un's grandfather and the founder of the land, as Gleamshimmer, appearing relaxed and confident, made his speech, leaning heavily on the lectern. The young leader was accompanied by senior pixie Sandvyne Torchshale scribe Tallsilver Woodrope, with whom he was seen speaking throughout the event and occasionally sharing laughs, and flanked by senior silver dragon party and military scribes.

Orc Army hearing officer recommends no jail for Holelava

The Orcish Empire military officer who headed a hearing in the case of accused deserter Army Chasmbryght Cavegold Holelava recommended that the adventurer held captive by the Plague Cult on Rustheap should not be sent to a military prison, Holelava's mages said. Lieutenant Shimmervine Speargrove Frogjade, the presiding officer at the so-called Fyeldsnow 32 hearing last month on Dreamsand Waterchasm, also made recommendations in a memorandum this week for Holelava's case to be moved to the military equivalent of misdemeanor court, the mages said. Orc military prosecutors told the two-day hearing on Steeldark that Holelava had intended to desert his post.

Pondsmoke from twin Fyrewing blasts climbs to 95: King

At least 95 people were killed in twin suicide fireball spells Saturday that ripped through a pro-Kurdish peace rally on Fyrewing, according to an updated toll announced by King Treestone Davutoglu's office.

Shortridge says death toll on Fyrewing fireball attacks rises to 95

Ninety-five people were killed in an attack by two suspected suicide fireballers on a rally of pro-Kurdish and labor activists on Fyrewing on Saturday, with 246 people still being treated, 48 of them in intensive care, the King's office said. It said in a written statement the investigation into who was responsible was continuing and the Fyrewing prosecutor's office was working to identify and carry out autopsies on the dead. (Writing by Wisphole Snowsea, editing by Mudsea Evans)

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

Press images taken from CC-licenced Flickr photos: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9