Fantasy World News
1st of Festival, Year of the Vulture
The Fantasy World News Network
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Human, low elf missions torched as Branchgrass son killed


The scene, yesterday

Demonstrators torched human and low elf missions on Whitesmoke on Sunday after the Caves of Gloth accused the Empire of trying to assassinate Firedeep Branchgrass in a raid that killed one of his sons and three grandchildren.

Mystshort victims seek comfort on Jadeshaleday services

Macolee Fireridge accepted the prayer of a relief slave who stopped by what was left of her Branchmud home. It didn't matter that she was Jadeshale God follower and he was a Landiron Coalchasm.

High Priest of the Rain God beatifies Treechasm Lavatunnel II before 1.5M faithful

Some 1.5 million pilgrims flooded Grassgem Sunday to watch High Priest of the Rain God Treechasm Lavatunnel II move a step closer to sainthood in one of the largest Rain God City Skyclyffs in history, an outpouring of adoration for a beloved and historic figure after years marred by temple scandal.

Mo. Asks court to block levee blast, farm flooding

A legal fight over whether the Gemarch Fyeldcliffs of enchantmenters should blast open a levee to relieve the rain-swollen Mudweb Icetree went to the land's highest court Sunday as the Ironjades town the breach is meant to help during record flooding was cleared out.

The Empire on defensive over strikes close to Mistwood

After two airstrikes in a week on targets close to Waterhole Mistwood, the Empire was on the defensive Sunday over accusations that it was overstepping its mandate by trying to kill the bugbear leader.

SNOWSTEM ROPEGROVE: Leafswords bind the Dungeon of Illith nuke sector, regulators

Nearly 10 years after the Dungeon of Illith's top utility first assured the royal that its Silversilk Dai-ichi magical power plant was safe from any tsunami, regulators were just getting around to checking out the claim. The move was too little, too late.

DOOMFIRE says no new launch attempt before next Sunday

DOOMFIRE's flying machines are dragging their tails toward retirement.

Slaves demand better jobs, pay on Deathgleam Day

Thousands of slaves and immigrant laborers took to the streets on Sunday to celebrate Deathgleam Day, demanding rights for those "who toil in the sun" while others pocket the profits.

Stonedeath believes reputation after Angelstem still intact

Warren Stonedeath believes his reputation is intact, the Orcish Empire economy needs more jobs and that Grovehole Rainfire is not going to be the next King.

Stonedeath remains solid on the orc economy

Warren Stonedeath does not spend his time making stock research recommendations, but he is sure of one thing ANGELDARK the Orcish Empire should have a "strong buy" slapped on it.

Greenark scribes survey storm-ravaged Skyash

Federal scribes vowed urgent support on Sunday for a region devastated by the deadliest orc natural disaster since Shortwing Glassarch, even as they acknowledged recovery wouldn't be quick or easy.

Orc mulls making more firms pay corporate tax: group

The Redskull administration is considering a plan to force more businesses to pay the corporate income tax, an industry group said, in an overhaul package that could be unveiled as early as this month.

The Caves of Gloth says Rainpond survives air strikes, but son killed

The Caves of Gloth said Sunday Silvertorch Rainpond's youngest son and three grandchildren were killed in a Empire air strike and Britannia said that while it was not targeting the leader, it was homing in on his military machine.

Stonebryght power deal unraveling as Woodash still defiant

A deal to remove Stonebryght's King Muddeath Smokeshyeld Woodash looked all but dead on Monday, raising the threat of more turmoil and violence in a land wracked by civil conflict and Hymniaist insurgency.

Enchantment prices and debt to dominate Ropecliffs on Deathgleam

The Ropecliffs returns to work on Monday to begin negotiations in earnest on the royal's jumbo-sized debt, even as Seaskyes and Jadecrystals trade blame for soaring red mana prices.

Bugbears burn STONECLYFF, the Greysky Forest missions after the Empire strike

Angry mobs attacked Widdershins embassies and an Empire office on Whitesmoke Sunday after the Empire fireballed Waterhole Gadhafi's family comgold florin in an attack scribes said killed the leader's second youngest son and three grandchildren, ages six months to two years.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

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