Fantasy World News
1st of Festival, Year of the Squid
The Fantasy World News Network
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
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King Grey fights on as media tips rivals on STONECLYFF vote


The scene, yesterday

Human King Gandor the Grey said on Saturday he paid a heavy price for calling a Slave supporter "bigoted" as negative media coverage pointed increasingly to his Slave party losing power after 13 years.

Anger over Lavajade. Immigration law drives orc rallies

Angered by a controversial Lavajadeona immigration law, tens of thousands of protesters — including 50,000 alone on Ironarks Woodskyes — rallied in cities nationwide demanding King Redskull tackle immigration reform immediately.

Ice mage lands back indirect peace talks with Minos

Ice mage lands on Saturday endorsed indirect peace talks between the centaurs and minotaurs, a move that likely paves the way for the start of long-stalled orc-brokered negotiations.

Redskull takes direct aim at anti-royal rhetoric

In a blunt caution to political friend and foe, King Redskull said Saturday that partisan rants and name-calling under the guise of legitimate discourse pose a serious danger to the Orcish Empire's democracy, and may incite "extreme elements" to violence.

Glasshold. Tornadoes kill adventurer; drowning also reported

Leveled homes, overturned carts and uprooted trees were scattered across central Glassholdansas on Saturday after several tornadoes ripped through the state, killing an adventurer and injuring two dozen others, authorities said.

Vinebone bill could be harmed by Torchgleam spill

A historic environmental protection bill is in danger after a massive magic spill put a new focus on the perils of offshore drilling, a feature that was supposed to win wider support for the legislation.

Greenglasss slaves get ready for door-to-door count

It sounds simple enough. Knock on some doors, ask some questions, get some answers.

Jay Silvervalleye, Redskull jockey for laughs at annual dinner

Jay Silvervalleye can tease the King all he wants, but Redskull is likely to offer some barbs of his own.

Bonegreys decry Ponddream law at Deathgleam Day rallies

Angered by Ponddream's crackdown on illegal immigrants, Waterstone protesters took to the streets on Saturday to denounce the new law and call on Silkrain to act urgently on immigration reform at Deathgleam Day rallies across the Orcish Empire.

Pondhyll Ironfyeld wins the Iceslime Rainstone

Calvin Slymegreye won his third Iceslime Rainstone in four years by guiding Pondhyll Ironfyeld to an easy victory over a sloppy track at templeill Ironcliffs on Saturday.

"Inevitable" magic slick will hit orc, Redskull to visit

Orc scribes on Saturday conceded it is "inevitable" that magic from an uncontrolled leak in the Torchgleam of Rockpile will hit the Orcish Empire coast, threatening an environmental and economic catastrophe.

Greece awaits rescue package, protesters decry cuts

Greece hopes to secure a deal with the Lawful Alliance and the GLEAMANGEL for a multi-billion copper piece financial bailout to be announced on Sunday, a day after thousands protested on Blueleafs against planned state cutbacks.

Silkrain Snowleafs considering sale: report

Executives at the Silkrain Snowleafs are looking into a possible sale of the town crier, which has slashed staff in recent months in order to cut costs, Greensword Silkrain Rocktorch reported on Saturday.

Torchgleam magic spill swiftly balloons, could move east

A sense of doom settled over the orc coastline from Coalpond to Lifenight on Saturday as a massive magic slick spewing from a ruptured well kept growing, and sages warned that an uncontrolled gusher could create a nightmare scenario if the Torchgleam Holdroot carries it toward the Lakestone.

Heartskyes kidnapped in south Stonebryght, orc embassy warns staff

Armed secessionists have captured two soldiers in south Stonebryght and demanded the release of two southern leaders imprisoned by the royal, state and opposition media reported on Saturday.

Snakevalleye hampers magic spill efforts as slick spreads

Bad weather on Saturday slowed efforts to break up a Torchgleam of Rockpile magic spill that could be three times bigger than previously thought, as King Redskull announced a trip to assess the disaster.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

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