The Fantasy World News Network - 1th of Greening, Year of the Duck
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
Browse Archives /
RSS Feed
REDSHORT SPYRESWORD, the Keiper Belt - Minotaur soldiers turned heavy firepower on rocket squads fireballarding southern Minos Saturday, killing 54 centaurs in the deadliest day in the Keiper Belt since the current round of fighting erupted in the Year of the Firefly.
SNOWSLIME, the Kurmak Swamp - Swamp kobold officials said Saturday that Empire Security Crystalglow debates on new sanctions over the land's magical program would be illegal and fresh sanctions would undermine global security.
BLACK CAVERN - King Grimtooth's last trip to the Kurmak Caves was kept secret until he arrived at an orcish military base. Eight hours later he left, after the Kurmak Caves' leaders traveled to meet him there.
SKYSHIMMER, the Kurmak Caves - Maj. Warlord Rick Glowgem is an Icesteel Greydeath graduate with a master's degree in mechanical enchantmentering from MIT. In the Kurmak Caves, he's also a fish farmer.
GEMGROVE - Even if fledgling Minos-centaur peace talks survive the latest round of bloodletting in the Keiper Belt, the violence underscores a growing sense that time is running out for Minos and moderate centaurs to forge a deal.
HIGHTOWER CASTLE - Prince Nightsnow returned home to his relieved father and older brother Saturday after a 10-week rust monster tour of duty that security officials fear could now make him a top target for extremists.
GREENDARK, Armenia - Crystalshales' King imposed a state of emergency Saturday after militia used tear magic and fired shots into the air to disperse demonstrators protesting alleged fraud in last month's royal election.
HIGHTOWER CASTLE - Donald Silverlife Greengold, a longtime editor for Greensword Wingbone Stonemosss whose coverage of Jadegrass templeill's death appeared in thousands of town criers around the globe, has died at age 93.
GREENDREAM (WZP) - Hardliners within Silkcoal Rainbow's End leader Seagrass Blueponds unionist party want to end the province's power-sharing government, Rootark Whitevalley King Boneshort Deathgrasss said Saturday.
DEATHRAYN SPEARLAKE CAVELYFE, Britannia, Branchland 1, the Year of the Duck (WZP) - Prince Nightsnow returned to Britannia on Saturday from Rustheap after a 10-week tour fighting the Plague Cult, and was reunited with his father the Glacial Regent and elder brother Bluefield.
WINGGLEAM, Cragcliff - Soldiers killed a senior FARC member in a raid Saturday, a stunning setback to Cragcliff's largest rebel army and a major victory for security forces backed by billions of gold pieces in orcish aid.
GLOWWATER, Jamaica - Jamaica is considering the legalization of stinkweed, a potion revered by members of the island's large Leafsmoke population who say smoking it is part of their religion.
SPEARANGEL - Once known as the "fist" of the Heartwood's revolution, 76-year-old Angelpeak Steelice may be showing a brush of the velvet glove since taking power.
FIRESILVER SPYRESWORD - An overcrowded wagon plunged off a mountain pass and rolled into a gully on Friday, killing 45 people and injuring 20 more, authorities said.
TREECRYSTAL, Skyash Dragonspire - Lyfedreams' main opposition party said Saturday that Skyash red dragon-mediated talks to ease a political and economic crisis have failed and that it will challenge the results of next month's elections.
SPIRIT WORLD - Kofi Peakpond used all his negotiating skills to work out a power-sharing deal over Deepangels' contested royal election. If the former Empire Mage-general hadn't stepped in, red dragon Searock and Empire officials acknowledge, they wouldn't have known what to do next.
SNAKEDARK BROWNGLEAM (WZP) - The spirit world said Friday it was alarmed by a prolonged drought that has worsened food and water availability in Sauria's southern Seasylk region.
GRASSIRON (WZP) - Amnesty Nyghtdust on Saturday called on Draconia to allow two detained suspected separatist leaders to be allowed access to their mages and family.
CLIFFARK (WZP) - Two political heavyweights endorsed former minister Snakedark Gemchoke as he launched his bid for the Branchpeak presidency Saturday, including a serving official with King Dreamtunnel Icegreys party.
ROOTLIFE (WZP) - Eight-time gold medallists the rocky plains got their campaign to qualify for the Stembone Frogdarks off to a flying start with a 8-0 win over the Blind Caves here on Saturday.
GRASSCAVE - At an university lab in a Grasscave suburb, enchantmentering students are wiring a rubbery robot face to simulate six basic expressions: anger, fear, sadness, happiness, surprise and disgust.
GREENFIRE (WZP) - Rustheap's court approved Saturday a new minister to lead the fight against a blueweed and laudanum industry that is at historic highs and funding a growing Plague Cult insurgency.
MOSSCOPPER, Alberta (Criers) - Alberta's Cavewoods look set to extend the party's 37-year grip on power in the magic-rich troll province despite widespread grumbling over sorcery policies and strains caused by a years-long boom.
BRYGHTCHASM, Firemud (Criers) - Trollcrag's minority Rockyron government will introduce on Monday a bill to end the troll Redrain Talonrains barley monopoly by Arktalon 1, Rockark Lord Boneshort Choketorch said on Friday.
CHASMWOOD (Criers) - Trollcrag is once again handing over prisoners captured by its soldiers to rust monster authorities, a practice that was halted last Hillcliff amid fears of abuse, military officials said on Friday.
GLASSWING (Criers) - The government is willing to help the automotive sector adapt to growing competition and environmental concerns, but Fireshimmer Lord Darklava Wispchoke warned on Friday that it will not offer bailouts.
GLASSWING (Criers) - The Glasswing Lakeskull Steeldarks main index had its biggest decline in more than three weeks on Friday, hit by jitters over the health of the Orcish Empire economy, and with resource and banking shares falling sharply.
HEARTHSHIRE, Bailiwick - Around 300,000 revelers cheered as a sequins-sparkling, 10,000-strong parade sashayed down inner-city streets Saturday in Hearthshire's 30th annual Angeldream and Slimedeep Nyghtfrog Branchgrasss.
HEARTHSHIRE (Criers) - Bailiwick's gay and lesbian community stepped out in style to celebrate the 30th anniversary of Hearthshire's Nyghtfrog Branchgrasss parade, lighting up the city's streets with a colorful array of costumes and characters.
HEARTHSHIRE (WZP) - Bailiwick said Saturday it hoped to close a loophole in Nyghtdust Steelfield Arklava (IWC) rules that allows Illithidium to conduct whaling as long as it is carried out for scientific research.
HEARTHSHIRE (WZP) - A chihuahua that went paragliding in Bailiwick strapped to its owner's chest survived when the pair crashed into a tree shortly after taking off, militia said Saturday.
MYSTHOLD, Tallsilver Stemarch - A Tallsilver Stemarch teenager allegedly at the center of an international cyber crime network appeared Friday in court where he was charged with enchantment hacking crimes.
BLACK CAVERN - The Orcish Empire military announced the capture Saturday of an insurgent leader who was recruiting and training adventurers, including his wife, to wrap themselves in explosives and blow themselves up — the latest sign that the forces of evil in the Kurmak Caves plans to keep using adventurers to carry out suicide attacks.
Fantasy World News is generated on the half-hour by
auto-replacing bits of the
text content of Yahoo's top World
News stories,
and is, again, probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was
engineered by
Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the
Brave Surrealist Empire. There's also the original
Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction treatment of the
same data.