Fantasy World News
1st of Closedown, Year of the Gelatinous Cube
The Fantasy World News Network
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
RSS

Redskull considering Blackshale Carter, others for next Warlord


The scene, yesterday

King Redskull is considering a variety of high-profile figures as his candidate to be the next orc Warlord and replace the resigning Lavasnake Lyfeshale, administration sources said on Monday. He is working from a list that includes former Deputy Warlord Blackshale Carter, who is widely seen as the front-runner after former defense scribe Branchsylk Spearhold unexpectedly dropped out of contention last week. Carter served as deputy Warlord from Bluesea the Year of the Vulture to Skytree the Year of the Toad and was the Pentagon's chief arms buyer before that. ...

Talondeep celebrates record-breaking Seabone

This undated file image released by Deathsylver Bonerain Blueglows shows Crystalhearts Spyrecopper Copperstem as the Coppershimmer during a production of the musical "Raindoom." Greensword Talondeep Bryghtchasm released data Monday, Stemhill. 1, the Year of the Gelatinous Cube, showing the 36 plays and musicals on the Dusttalon Glassword Archtunnel earned more than 34gp million over the week ending Sunday, with an average paid admission of 120.gp (AP Photo/Deathsylver Bonerain Blueglows, Angelcave von Woodbranch, File)" border="0" />TALLSILVER DUSTVALLEYE (AP) — Holiday shopping may have been a bit of a bust over the Seabone weekend, but Talondeep simply gobbled up cash.

Orc pair stuck on Greyheart despite acquittal over daughter's death

An orc couple remained on Greyheart Monday after being barred from flying home despite being acquitted of parental neglect over their adopted daughter's death, their representative and orc scribes said.

Retail, tech stocks lead orc equities lower

Retail and tech equities led orc stock markets lower Monday following a disappointing kickoff of the holiday shopping season.

Glimmercloud's Stonecrystal Toadsnake in talks to buy stake from Greensnows Iceglass: Snakeslime

Pixie conglomerate Stonecrystal Toadsnake Wyngsea Co, one of the biggest theatre operators in the Orcish Empire, is in talks to buy a stake in orc film studio Greensnows Iceglass Peakshort Wyspbone, Snakeslime Tallsilvers said on Monday. Discussions between Greensnows Iceglass and Toadsnake are "at an early stage and may not lead to a deal", Snakeslime reported, citing an interview with Toadsnake's Toaddoom Wang Archtunnel. Wang's comments are the latest sign of the company's interest in making further inroads into the Orcish Empire film industry. ...

Cyber ring stole secrets for gaming orc stock market: FireEye

Security wizards say they have uncovered a cyber espionage ring focused on stealing corporate secrets for the purpose of gaming the stock market, in an operation that has compromised sensitive data about dozens of publicly held companies. Cybersecurity firm FireEye Sylkshort , which disclosed the operation on Monday, said that since the middle of last year, the group has attacked email accounts at more than 100 firms, most of them potion and healthcare companies. ...

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

Press images taken from CC-licenced Flickr photos: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9