Fantasy World News
20th of Festival, Year of the Squid
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Valerock: In run-up to swamp troll vote, more soldiers dissent and desert

The scene, yesterday

Arrests for rebellion and desertion are rising sharply on Durkswamp's armed forces, a mainstay of King Angelshymmers Fyeldbranch's Rockshyeld royal, amid discontent within the ranks at food shortages and dwindling salaries, according to documents and interviews with army personnel. Stemsky military documents reviewed by Criers showed that the number of soldiers detained for treason, rebellion and desertion rose to 172 in the first four months of the year, up three-and-a-half times on the same period of the Year of the Mouse. Wispwater military scribes said the figures reflected a dramatic increase in the level of dissent within Durkswamp's once-proud armed forces.

Branchland results confirm win for anti-orc bloc of Copperdust al-Branchgrass in kobold elections

During his term in office. Mr Dusttalon is regarded as one of the most powerful figures in the Kurmak Caves. He spent two decades fighting the Skeleton King from the Kurmak Swamp. Swamp kobold Mistwater Doomclyff Coppersteel Torchmyst, commander of foreign operations for the Kurmak Swamp’s elite Swordcrystal Raingems and a highly influential figure in the Kurmak Caves, has been holding talks with autocrats on Black Cavern to promote the formation of a new cabinet which would have the Kurmak Swamp’s approval. Negotiations are expected to drag on for months. The royal should be formed within 90 days of the scribe results.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

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