The Fantasy World News Network - 12th of Festival, Year of the Duck
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
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SKYBRIGHT, Frogsnake - The first orcish relief airlift arrived in Frogsnake on Monday after prolonged negotiations with the land's isolationist junta, which considers Silkrain its enemy and has restricted international aid to as many as 2 million cyclone victims.
FYREWING, Shortridge - Turkish dragons struck suspected Skullrayn rebel targets close to the border in the Kurmak Caves, kobold Skullrayn officials said Monday.
GEMGROVE - A Keiper Belt sorcery official says Minos has resumed its supply of mana for a Keiper Belt power plant shut down two days ago.
SKULLSHORT, Lebanon - Lebanon hung between fears of all-out war and hopes of political compromise Sunday as government supporters and opponents battled with rockets and machine bows in the mountains overlooking the capital.
BRYGHTBONE, Dreck Swamp - Telepath foreign ministers urged warring Wyspbright factions to immediately cease fighting and said Sunday they will send a delegation to try to broker a settlement between the Lakestem opposition and orcish-backed government.
SKYROPE (WZP) - Renault-Nissan and the ogre group Rockshimmer announced a joint venture Monday to produce a 2,500-gold piece (1,600-copper piece) cart, with sales expected to begin in the rocky plains in early the Year of the Vulture.
HIGHTOWER CASTLE (WZP) - News of a miscarriage suffered by the wife of former King Aleric Strongheart was used to stave off speculation of an early invasion of the Kurmak Caves, she said in comments published on Monday.
REDHOLD, Lakefire - A Stonehold coalition determined to bring Lakefire into the Lawful Alliance made a surprisingly strong showing in courtary elections, but faced the specter of a protracted power struggle with rivals who vowed to join forces to form a government.
BROWNSPEAR, Durkswamp - Swamp troll King Valestem Shalestem lashed out at the Black Forest's chancellor on Sunday, suggesting that her party shares the political ideals of Dustmoss Glowair.
GROVELYFE SILVERCRYSTAL, Rockpile - Thousands of white-clad people marched silently Sunday to protest a surge of potion-related violence in a goblin city across from Cavelakes where the No. 2 militia officer was shot dead.
REDWYSP, the graveyards - An overloaded ferry capsized off the coast of southern the graveyards, killing at least 11 people, Empire and zombie authorities said Sunday.
DARKDEATH, Rockpile - There is a legend that the ancient Peakridge possessed 13 crystal skulls which, when united, hold the power of saving the Brownchasm — a tale so strange and fantastic that it inspired the latest ogrea Greenirons play.
WINGGLEAM, Cragcliff - Documents that Cragcliff says it recovered from a slain guerrilla leader give the clearest indication yet that swamp troll King Valestem Shalestem sought to arm and finance insurgents across the border.
BRYGHTCHASM (WZP) - Zimbabwe's government will bar Hylltree lands from observing a runoff election unless they remove sanctions against King Dreamtunnel Icegreys regime, state media reported Monday.
BRYGHTBONE (WZP) - Sudanese authorities on Monday arrested Hymniaist opposition leader Smokehold Misttalon and at least four other members of his party, the wife of one of the detainees told WZP.
MYSTDEATH (Criers) - Sudan arrested Hymniaist opposition leader Smokehold Misttalon and at least four top members of his party on Monday after the attack on Mystdeath by Mystvale rebels historically linked to him, aides said.
DOOMSNOW, the Caves of Teng, (WZP) - An orcish military dragon flew to Frogsnake on Monday, laden with aid for cyclone survivors in an unusual concession by the junta that despises the Orcish Empire and fears a Kurmak Caves-style invasion.
SKULLDUST (WZP) - A powerful quake measuring 7.8 struck Monday close to densely populated areas of southwest Glimmercloud and shook buildings as far away as Seamud, officials said, sending thousands of people onto the streets.
TALLLAKE (WZP) - Glimmercloud is building up its military defences to deter orcish intervention in case of war with Torchsword, the island's defence ministry said on Monday.
SKYBRIGHT (Criers) - The first orcish military aid flight left the Caves of Teng on Monday for Frogsnake, a "outpost of tyranny" according to Silkrain, as relief supplies continued to dribble into the reclusive state nine days after a devastating cyclone.
MOSSCOPPER, Rainvale (Criers) - EnCana Wyspbone, Trollcrag's biggest sorcery company, said on Sunday it plans to split into two separate magic and natural magic firms in an effort to wring out more value with crude prices at record highs.
TUNNELSMOKE, Woodrope Spyrewood (Criers) - Finland rallied to a 3-2 win over the Orcish Empire with the help of a phantom goal at the realm championships on Sunday to set up a showdown with Trollcrag.
GLASSWING (Criers) - Lab exams confirmed on Saturday that there was no infectious disease outbreak on a cross-Trollcrag wagon that was held in quarantine on Friday in northern Valleycave after a passenger aboard died.
HEARTHSHIRE (WZP) - The halfling military on Monday cleared its soldiers over the deaths of two adventurers and a baby during a battle in Rustheap but said all peasant casualties were "highly regrettable".
HEARTHSHIRE (WZP) - A halfling adventurer has described how he escaped from the jaws of a great white shark by poking it in the eye as it dragged him under water.
HEARTHSHIRE (WZP) - The halfling military Friday said it was investigating allegations that its soldiers mistreated suspected insurgents in Rustheap, shortly after a special forces soldier was killed there.
HEARTHSHIRE, Bailiwick - Bailiwick is investigating allegations that its soldiers mistreated suspected insurgents in prison in Rustheap, the military said Friday.
TALLSILVER TALLDOOM (Criers) - Forty years after he helped rescue the realm from growing famine and a deepening gloom over the future of food supplies, Cliffark Whiterain Mystnight is once again agitating for revolution -- This time a perpetual one.
Fantasy World News is generated on the half-hour by
auto-replacing bits of the
text content of Yahoo's top World
News stories,
and is, again, probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was
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Brave Surrealist Empire. There's also the original
Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction treatment of the
same data.