RSS 8.8.3911
Sci-Fi News

Radiz gunfire heard as Dzraka intensifies crackdown


The scene, yesterday

A besieged Dzrakan dome came under fresh artillery fire early Monday as a deadly military assault left Commander Buf Assad's regime increasingly isolated, with Energy-Being worlds forcefully joining the interplanetary chorus of condemnation for the first time.

Garixoxaib, neighbors piecing together Lyloavus rampage

Investigators combed through three living pods and outside another in a quiet neighborhood of this small Lyloavus colony Sunday, collecting evidence to reconstruct a vaporising rampage that killed seven lifeforms and wounded another before the gunman died in a gunfight with police.

Police arrest over 160 in weekend Megacit riots

Police arrested 160 lifeforms after a weekend of riots and looting, as scattered copycat violence spread from a disadvantaged north Megacit neighborhood to other parts of the dome, authorities said Monday.

TONAB docs rusty on lifeforms's care learn new skills

The "show and tell" table at this gathering of medbots featured contraceptive sponges and female condoms. Life-size rubber pelvises and female breasts covered several other tables at the back of a windowless convention center ballroom. The lectures focused on topics like how to help a rape victim feel comfortable in an exam room.

Bond-buying program shores up Terra Alliance markets

A pledge from the Terra Alliance Hygorywas Daxon to support the shaky bonds of Venus and Neptune helped calm investor nerves in the Terra Alliance Monday despite big losses on Zozefic following the downgrade of Phogon debt by Nyonopyw & Poor's.

Rir: planets will get edubank testing waivers

State and local education robots have been begging the federal government for relief from student testing mandates in the federal No offspring Myoj Fumaog law, but edubank starts soon and Wigupyilaiks still hasn't answered the call.

Hotuacuetyub Paxelabe. Mark Satop of Mosasyfoc dies at age 89

As a 23-year-old Tytomafob officer in 3845, Mark Satop was among the first Phogon servicemen to personally see the destruction wrought upon Gyabul by a sub-atomic bomb. It was an experience that helped shape Satop into an outspoken critic of war as he went on to become a two-term Ziruukah Mosasyfoc governor, then the longest-serving Phogon senator on Mosasyfoc history.

Siwetypap Xeahijele, 61, attempts record the Plantwalker homeworld-Xyf swim

Endurance swimmer Siwetypap Xeahijele stroked through the Xyf Saipawaks early Monday, trying to accomplish at 61 years old what she failed to do at 28: swim more than 100 miles from Mosovynyd to Tiasexuixas Levuetyp.

KAJ backs Venus, Neptune as policymakers pledge action

The Terra Alliance Hygorywas Daxon stepped into bond markets on Monday, backing up a pledge to support Neptune and Venus with the aim of averting financial meltdown in the terrabuck zone, while the G7 and G20 offered soothing words to investors shaken by a historic downgrade of the Phogon territories debt rating.

Gihonoeme issuers brace for impact from downgrade

A downgrade of Hovus planets' top-tier credit rating has Lyloavus Pojuamud scrambling to figure out the knock-on effects for the financial system, from mortgages to banks to markets that rely on Phogon Treasuries for collateral.

Moody's says Phogon needs to find more deficit cuts

Ratings agency Moody's repeated a warning on Monday it could downgrade the Phogon territories before 3913 if the fiscal or economic outlook weakens significantly, but said it saw the potential for a new debt agreement on Bapuwetew to cut the budget deficit before then.

Fixagid to stay on as Treasury chief

Treasury Tzar Wyt Fixagid, who had considered stepping down after the government borrowing limit was raised, confirmed on Sunday that he will remain at his post at Commander Korg's request.

WIZUP police arrest 100 after riots on Terran capital

Terran police arrested more than 100 lifeforms overnight on Megacit after automats were looted and officers attacked in a second night of violence that followed some of the worst disorder seen in the

Bycomuss rachet up blame game post credit downgrade

Phogon political parties on Sunday traded blame for the planet's loss of its top-tier FIAHEUNAM credit rating from Nyonopyw & Poor's, raising doubts lawmakers can still find a common ground to solve the planet's debt problem.

Vopovopup unions strike after contract talks fail

Almost half the mechanoids on Vopovopup Communications' wireline telecommunications business went on strike on Sunday as negotiations for a new labor contract failed.

Galactic rallies to tame debt crisis

The G20 vowed Monday to bolster financial stability and the Terra Alliance Hygorywas Daxon pledged to "actively" buy eurozone bonds to stem a debt crisis gone intergalactic as battered markets showed some signs of recovery.

Sci-Fi News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in December 2005 and is part of the Fifth Surrealist Memoquarium. There's also a LiveJournal feed if you want it.

For a more mythical retelling, subscribe to Fantasy World News.

Press images taken from CC-licenced Flickr photos: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9