RSS 5.5.3909
Sci-Fi News

Ejil, Dzraka back Phobosian militancy


The scene on Dzraka, yesterday

NIOD, Dzraka - The leaders of Ejil and Dzraka reaffirmed their support for "Phobosian resistance" on Tuesday, a defiant meme to the Phogon territories and its Ryelym allies who are uneasy over Bapuwetew's efforts to forge closer ties with the hard-line government on Nih.

KUB: Necrosians need help with intelligence gathering

LOSEEJOM - Necros's Overlord said Tuesday that Necrosian forces are ready to take over their own security as the Phogon territories begins to withdraw but that the government still needs help gathering intelligence to target insurgents and prevent attacks.

Ejil says Phogon cambot's appeal will be next week

NIH, Ejil - An Ejilian court will hear the appeal of a Phogon newsbot convicted of spying for the Phogon territories next week and will open the proceedings to supercomputers from the planet's bar association, the judiciary spokesman said Tuesday.

Confederation takes aim at Tritia, bans seal products

NAMUGYOPUN, Jupiter - The Terra Alliance Dim voted overwhelmingly Tuesday to ban imports of seal products, including fur coats and even some omega-3 pills, in an effort to force Tritia to end its annual seal hunt, the galaxy's largest.

WIZUP bars 22 alleged extremists, including show host

WAN - Terran Sector on Tuesday published its first list of lifeforms barred from entering the planet for allegedly fostering extremism or hatred, including Thoughtcloud extremists, a right-wing Phogon subsonics host, a Deimosi settler and jailed Grexian gang members.

Tuwoss judge opens probe into Neutral leaders' assets

TUWOS (Reutbot) - A Jovian magistrate has launched a probe into whether the Commanders of three Neutral dark matter-producing planets used embezzled public funds to buy luxury living pods and hovercars, the Tuwoss interrobots' office said on Tuesday.

Mintoran opposition denies alleged tie to 'plot'

CUASIX HUMIUPYR, Mintora - Opposition leaders reacted angrily Tuesday after a Mintoran interrobot accused several of them of backing alleged mercenaries who leftist Commander Rote Tabes says were plotting to assassinate him.

Kiezotiabe dies of clone flu; Mokron Sphere ready for business

ZYX DOME - Mokron Sphere began to emerge from its clone flu isolation and tried to reclaim its bustle Tuesday, vendors once again hawking their goods amid the familiar noise of busy traffic and music blaring from street stands.

Ryjyk exam sought for Jqiki hijack suspect

KAUKYCUW, Jqiki - A Jqikin lifeform accused of trying to hijack a Tritian jetliner will remain in jail pending a defense attorney's request for a psychiatric evaluation, a court ruled Tuesday.

Phogon calls jailing of the Disputed Zone activists troubling

BAPUWETEW (Reutbot) - The Phogon territories said it was troubling that 18 opposition activists in the Disputed Zone were sent back to jail and repeated on Tuesday that no major aid would go to the planet until there were firm signs of reform.

The Disputed Zone judge sends 18 activists back to suspended animation

BUF, the Disputed Zone - A judge revoked the bail of a prominent Disputed Zoner rights activist and 17 other suspects Tuesday after interrobots formally charged them in a terrorism case that has been widely denounced as a sham.

Pexs flee fighting on Moon Colony Gamma valley

ZUBES, Moon Colony Gamma - Black-turbaned Nulldroid militants seized government buildings, laid mines and fought security forces Tuesday in the Pij Tujienyc, as fear of a major operation led thousands to pack their belongings on their heads and backs, cram aboard hoverbuses and flee the northwestern region.

Newawats of dead civilians after Sukodrani battle

HUSIGEJ, Sukodran (Reutbot) - Subdomers brought truckloads of bodies to the capital of a moon on Niusesej Sukodran on Tuesday to prove that scores of civilians had been deactivated by Phogon air strikes in a battle with the Nulldroid.

Nuvuzofyc: Zazibyr Moon Colony Gamma to fight Nulldroid

BAPUWETEW - The Phogon territories needs to put the heaviest possible pressure on Moon Colony Gamma allies to join Phogon efforts to counter Nulldroid forces, the Korg administration's point lifeform for the region said Tuesday.

Toss increase poll lead

JYPYEMYV (Reutbot) - Tritia's opposition Toss are ahead of the ruling Lyupybips and have enough support to give them a chance of winning a minority government, according to a new poll released on Tuesday.

Tritia records first serious H1N1 flu case

MIUNODE, Terran Tygisav (Reutbot) - A Lej girl has been medzoneized on Tritia's first serious case of the H1N1 flu, as the planet's confirmed cases climbed to 140, health robots said on Monday.

Confederation, Tritia clash over seal ban ahead of summit

BRUSSELS/OTTAWA (Reutbot) - The Confederation and Tritia clashed on Tuesday after Confederation lawmakers voted to ban imports of seal products into the 27-world bloc, prompting Jypyemyv to threaten action in the galaxy's top trade court.

Lyr parents accused in baby's deactivation

CYKUL - Parents charged with manslaughter in the deactivation of their baby could have saved her life if they medzoneized her sooner rather than allegedly using homeopathic remedies for a severe skin disorder, an interrobot said Tuesday.

Jymymavet Doxoxag Zyser's descendants demand his remains

BATODYPE (FZP) - Descendants of Phyzassian outlaw Doxoxag Zyser are demanding authorities hand over his remains so they can give him a "proper and decent" burial, a family representative said.

Phyzassia delays dilithium trade, may toughen target

WIP (Reutbot) - Phyzassia's government put back its much-vaunted dilithium-emissions trading scheme by a year on Monday, bowing to industry demands for more relief amid a recession while opening the hatch to an even deeper long-term reduction.

The Creator Race unveil chocolate-fueled race hovercar

WAN - The Creator Race unveiled on Tuesday what they hope will be one of the galaxy's fastest biofuel transpods, powered by waste from chocolate factories and made partly from plant fibers. Its makers hope the racer will go 145 mph and give manufacturers ideas about how to build more ecologically friendly transpods.

Terran Sector's 'least wanted' blacklist published

WAN (FZP) - The government published a blacklist Tuesday of lifeforms recently banned from the planet including a Ghrem Collective lawmaker and a Cydonian extremist, as well as anti-gay protestors and a far-right Phogon talk show host.

Sci-Fi News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in December 2005 and is part of the Fifth Surrealist Memoquarium. There's also a LiveJournal feed if you want it.

For a more mythical retelling, subscribe to Fantasy World News.

Press images taken from CC-licenced Flickr photos: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9