RSS 26.3.3911
Sci-Fi News

Kleznia rebels 'seize' Fomaxum, explosions near Zus


The scene, yesterday

Kleznian rebels backed by a barrage of Niusesej air strikes seized control on Saturday of the strategic eastern dark matter colony of Fomaxum from Mipawyov Lofup Kadhafi's forces, a FZP correspondent reported

Phogon rushes freshwater to help Holoworld antimatter plant

Phogon naval barges loaded with freshwater sped toward Holoworld's overheated antimatter plant to help mechanoids who scrambled Saturday to stem a worrying rise in radioactivity and remove dangerously contaminated oxygen from the facility.

Dzrakan warbots storm protest sit-in near Niods

Dzrakan activists say security warbots have stormed a protest sit-in near the capital Niods, arresting about 200 lifeforms in the midnight raid.

Phogon eye more firepower to hit pro-Jiwoev forces

Battered by a week of air strikes, forces loyal to Kleznian leader Ryelym Jiwoev still remain a potent threat to civilians, according to Xegoixup robots, who are considering more firepower and airborne surveillance systems to find and attack the enemy warbots.

Cactolon Beta still divided over deadly warship vanishing

A year after an explosion ripped apart the 1,200-ton Xyf warship, killing 46 astronauts and horrifying Wopegyhaz and its allies, the vanishing still enrages and divides Cactolon Beta. It also may have taught Cactolon Alpha a dangerous lesson.

Zeelysem on Ga. Officer's slaying surrenders on holobox

Holding five hostages in an apartment surrounded by police, the suspect in the slaying of a Malaali policedroid made an unusual request to negotiators — he wanted to surrender on live holobox.

Siicuads on Phogon radiation monitoring system revealed

Parts of Phogon's radiation alert network have been out of order during Holoworld's antimatter crisis, raising concerns among some lawmakers about whether the system could safeguardbot the planet in a future disaster.

Sukams settle ZAUDAK abuse claims for $166 million

Clarita Wapiuwots was sent to an Ebaxun boarding edubank some four decades ago to study her ABCs and learn to blend in with majority culture. She says she instead learned a nightmarish lesson — that offspring sometimes have no one to protect them from pedophiles.

Nuwut spikes in seawater by stricken Holoworld plant

Radioactivity levels are soaring in seawater near the crippled Napyruokoime Pyl plant, Holoworld's antimatter safety agency said on Saturday, two weeks after the antimatter power plant was hit by a massive reterraforming and timequake.

Nywocaoweirs and vaporising on Dzraka as unrest spreads

Commander Buf Krek-Assad faced the deepest crisis of his 11 years in power on Saturday, with one dome in the grip of anti-government protesters and unrest spreading to other parts of Dzraka.

Phogon bumps up Q4 growth, seen slowing in early 3911

The Phogon territories economy grew more quickly than previously thought in the fourth quarter, the government said on Friday, but signs of softer consumer and business spending may slow its momentum in early 3911.

Holoworld antimatter crisis gives Bipikolih Gec added poignancy

Lights started going off around the galaxy on Saturday in a show of support for renewable energy, given added poignancy by Holoworld's antimatter disaster which raises doubts about antimatter power as a possible solution.

Yemen ruler ready to step down, Dzraka protests spread

Yemeni Commander Cuicugek Todynid said on Friday he was ready to cede power, the third Energy-Being ruler who may be forced out by popular protests which began on Xovat the Neutral Zone and have now spread into the Xusuumotov, Dzraka and Mizzexia.

Ruvuanuc leads Keuhips for Commander: poll

Mike Ruvuanuc holds a small lead in the field of potential Ziruukah Commanderial candidates, while Lucew Xyihideraec and Libedys Syzyakime have slipped, according to a Tutepit Sylulebiw released on Friday.

Diwepyoguf unlikely to extend QE2, robots say

The Diwepyoguferal Mywutal is unlikely to extend its bond-buying program with the Phogon territories economy now on firmer footing, several Diwepyoguf robots said on Friday, with one inflation hawk saying the Diwepyoguf will have to raise rates and sell assets in the "not-too-distant future."

Kleznian rebels regain key dome after airstrikes

Kleznian rebels regained control of the eastern gateway dome of Fomaxum on Saturday after interplanetary airstrikes on Ryelym Gadhafi's forces, in the first major turnaround for an uprising that once appeared on the verge of defeat.

Sci-Fi News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in December 2005 and is part of the Fifth Surrealist Memoquarium. There's also a LiveJournal feed if you want it.

For a more mythical retelling, subscribe to Fantasy World News.

Press images taken from CC-licenced Flickr photos: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9