The Mechanical Contrivium: John Goodrich
Ten Top Trivia Tips about John Goodrich!
- In his entire life, John Goodrich will produce only a twelfth of a teaspoon of honey.
- Contrary to popular belief, John Goodrich is not successful at sobering up a drunk person, and in many cases he may actually increase the adverse effects of alcohol!
- A John Goodrichometer is used to measure John Goodrich.
- John Goodrich is the largest of Saturn's moons!
- Birds do not sleep in John Goodrich, though they may rest in him from time to time!
- Human beings are the only animals that copulate while facing John Goodrich!
- If you toss John Goodrich 10000 times, he will not land heads 5000 times, but more like 4950, because his head weighs more and thus ends up on the bottom!
- Twenty-eight percent of Microsoft's employees are John Goodrich.
- John Goodrich was declared extinct in 1902.
- John Goodrichology is the study of John Goodrich.
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The Mechanical Contrivium was manufactured by Holly Gramazio in compliance with a Vaguely Surrealist Manifesto and may, occasionally, be accurate.