TV Misguidance

RANSOM-NOTE
TELEVISION
LISTINGS

Listings are created from individual lines taken from existing listings magazines.

Non-spliced humour? Try the Other Listings Magazine.

Concept:
Graham Sadler

Contributors:
Kevan Davis
Graham Sadler
Tyrethali
Raven Black
Chrissy

Sources:
Guardian Guide
Guardian Unlimited
Radio Times
et al

(To join in, just submit a programme. But make sure you know what this site's about, first.)

       

TV Misguidance has been mothballed, since it was only getting submissions from people who hadn't understood the joke, and people getting it mixed up with Other Listings Magazine.
3rd October 2001
19.00
GS
U.S. Major League Wars The teams discover that New York has been looted by the Hoobs.
19.30
GS
Family Street Steve, Sam, Siobhan and Pete meet to discuss Diane's IVF treatment, while Katie is attracted to Fletcher's midday cuppa.
20.00
KD
The Weakest Model Zöe Ball and various contestants go for the maximum with a final final battle against the final 21 girls.
21.00
KD
Home Front Porridge Lawrence Llewellyn-Bowen and Diarmuid Gavin decorate a property in Wanstead, for eight years.
22.55
KD
Lost in America Mediocre comedy documentary follows Philadelphia back to London.
23.30
KD
[FILM] The Eagle Has A Feather Steve is angry about the final mission of an American B-17 man who was fired for being trouble.

2nd October 2001
16.30
KD
Ready Steady Fire Antony Worrall Thompson takes viewers away from Normandy.
20.00
KD
Ground Force Roswell Alan Titchmarsh leads the team to transform a bungalow garden overlooking Portmellon, to cover an alien landing.
20.30
KD
The Dark Beginnings of Five Part one. The boy band competitors have to destroy a VW Golf.
21.00
GS
Les Dawson's Crime Scene The lamented comedian presents highlights from a tragic disaster that kills three elderly women.
23.50
GS
[FILM] Strange Crypt Drama charting a young monk's musical underground cemetary. Starring Elvis Presley and Luke Perry.
1:00 Pages from Ceefax (R) (S) (T) 1:15 Pages from Ceefax 1:35 Open University : Advanced Money (T) 2:00 Local Weather (T) 2:35 Pornography 3:00 Local News (T) 3:05 The Clangers (S) 3:35 Pages from Ceefax (S)

1st October 2001
19.00
KD
Emmerdale and the Mysterons Richard learns his relationship cannot survive agents' attempts to sabotage closure of the railway station.
19.30
C
'Orrible Street Audrey leads a rally against The Bear in the Big Blue House armed with three day's rations, a Dog and Captain Sensible.
20.30
C
Damp Challenge Cardiff University takes on women. The team's progress announcement leads to a wealth of information about a survival kit and $200.
23.30
KD
Silent Child's Chart Update Latest sounds from the Pepsi child's thought processes.
23.50
C
Pukka Wildlife New exhibition - Surrealism: Desire and pygmy marmosets.
1:00 The Clangers (T) 2:00 News 2:30 News 3:00 The Clangers (T) 3:10 Pages from Ceefax (T) 4:00 Work Essentials : Terrorists (T) 5:00 Pobol y Cwm (T) 5:20 Pages from Ceefax (S) 6:00 Pobol y Cwm

30th September 2001
14.30
KD
[FILM] Carry On Insurrection Comedy terrorism. President Bush declares war on Sid James.
15.25
KD
[FILM] Flipper : Annihilation Cute dolphin adventure about the kung fu legend, famed for his unpredictable disease anthrax.
18.00
GS
Sunday Challenge Viewers are invited to leave London for a while to see how Songs Of Praise is put together.
19.30
GS
Poltergeist Grove An evil entity attempts to take over Leeds after touching a pearlware horse held in the hands of a dead Goa'uld.
22.20
KD
Extinct Striptease Docu-drama about a stripper with a heart of dodo.
1:00 Ivor the Engine 1:45 Pornography 2:00 Sport : Deathmatch Car Boxing (S) 2:50 Ivor the Engine (T) 3:00 Sport : Women's Mud Wrestling from Chicago (R) 3:10 Local Weather (S) (T) 4:00 Pages from Ceefax (T) 4:55 Pobol y Cwm (T)

29th September 2001
21.00
KD
I Love 1995 Weather Retrospective thunderstorms talk about their deluge of rain.
23.10
KD
Art Boxing Coverage of fights at the Tate. Victoria Wood and Tory MP Ann found themselves stunned by Chris Tarrant.

28th September 2001
21.30
KD
They Think It's All Strange Nick Hancock presides over a religious cult known as the Kindred, whose members are able to explain the slanderous graffiti.
22.00
GS
Westcountry Affairs Joan Collins and Marc Almond are summoned to Widecombe Fair to investigate the activities of Pingu.
22.50
GS
Jo Brand's Flying Postcards Jo takes a look at Glendarroch House in Mesopotamia in search of breakfast.
23.30
KD
Shogun in Practice (S) New gal Jodine plummets when she attempts to party and the lads hold a DJ in Leeds.

27th September 2001
17.00
T
The Wild Way A look at the personalities and lifestyles of extreme-sports athletes. Among a school for geniuses. Mr. Feeney: William Daniels. Ms. Bertram: Jane Carr.
20.00
T
[FILM] The Power Lunch Russell visits a former co-worker (Stacy Keach), who sets him up with a job interview. But Don Chastain plays an Irish drummer with a line of blarney. Lorna Wright: Devon Ericson. B.A.: Mr. T.
20.30
KD
Sparkling Liquid Terry Wogan presents another treatment for normally fatal blood crimes.
21.00
RB
Chief Surgeon Who? Edwards links to a book; a woman has a phone-in appearance as the cross-dressing Cpl. Maxwell Q.
23.00
RB
Night Columbo The trenchcoat-attired inspector's antics surfaced in a suburban family's run-in with some paranormal syndication in 1983.
0:50 Learning Zone : AS-Level Rivers Revision 1:00 Learning Zone : Basic Powerboats (T) 1:15 Weather 2:00 Work Essentials : Spanish 3:00 Sport : Women's Deathmatch Rugby Lifting (S) (T) 3:35 Nightscreen 3:50 Ivor the Engine (T)

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