24 Dreaming
Right now, commas are plotting to flick a poisonous jam-jar. My C compiler is twittery, and elephants that I work with may be cheese-filled.

I'm Federal Agent Jack Bauer, and this is the jolliest bourbon biscuit of my life.

By Kevan in 2002, also to blame for the Surrealist Link
For greater coherence, try 24ever
Previously on 24...