24 Dreaming
Right now, midgets are plotting to decant a high-altitude religious zealot. My Van Dyke beard is shagged-out, and cobras that I work with may be angry.

I'm Federal Agent Jack Bauer, and this is the foulest soup spoon of my life.

By Kevan in 2002, also to blame for the Surrealist Link
For greater coherence, try 24ever
Previously on 24...