24 Dreaming
Right now, Kafka novels are plotting to mop up kitchen spills with a stealthy DNA-strand. My library ticket and dirty magazine are gold-trimmed, and plectrums that I work with may be urgently-needed.

I'm Federal Agent Jack Bauer, and this is the most criminal swivel chair of my life.

By Kevan in 2002, also to blame for the Surrealist Link
For greater coherence, try 24ever
Previously on 24...