24 Dreaming
Right now, gerbils are plotting to throw toilet rolls at a bisexual hunting jacket. My weevil and pine tree are dangerous, and imps that I work with may be slim.

I'm Federal Agent Jack Bauer, and this is the most inedible gin-and-tonic of my life.

By Kevan in 2002, also to blame for the Surrealist Link
For greater coherence, try 24ever
Previously on 24...