24 Dreaming
Right now, clodhoppers are plotting to spread rumours about a blunt little girl. My cave painting and ocelot are dead, and lemmings that I work with may be ovulating.

I'm Federal Agent Jack Bauer, and this is the beigest scroll of my life.

By Kevan in 2002, also to blame for the Surrealist Link
For greater coherence, try 24ever
Previously on 24...