TV Misguidance

RANSOM-NOTE
TELEVISION
LISTINGS

Listings are created from individual lines taken from existing listings magazines.

Non-spliced humour? Try the Other Listings Magazine.

Concept:
Graham Sadler

Contributors:
Kevan Davis
Graham Sadler

Sources:
Guardian Guide
Guardian Unlimited
Radio Times
et al

(To join in, just submit a programme. But make sure you know what this site's about, first.)

       

TV Misguidance has been mothballed, since it was only getting submissions from people who hadn't understood the joke, and people getting it mixed up with Other Listings Magazine.
26th January 2002
21.30
GS
Wildlife All Over The Pony Offbeat comedy and Olympic rowing in a pub car park, prompting intense rivalry between the duck-billed platypus and Steve Davis.
22.55
GS
[FILM] Gardener Academy A photographer falls foul of the long-running damp lawn.

25th January 2002
20.00
GS
Real Steady Sex Cook Penny Mallory, Mike Brewer and Jason Barlow race three of the newest scientists to combat a porn star who has decided to make a meal in just 20 minutes.
22.35
GS
Extreme Island Time Alex and Tom have cause to accommodate Britain and France with room to pay tribute to the seemingly lifeless two-day-old path of righteousness.

23rd January 2002
20.30
KD
Remarkable Homes Diarmuid Gavin is inspired for hanging wallpaper one-handed, and a doorbell that stops weather.
0:35 Sport : Under-15s Pro-Celebrity Carpentry Riding from Chichester (S) 1:00 Sport : Pro-Celebrity World-Cup Deathmatch Bare-Knuckle Car Wrestling (T) 1:40 Pages from Ceefax 1:55 Nightscreen (S) 2:00 Pornography (S) (T) 2:05 Pages from Ceefax (S)

21st January 2002
13.10
GS
[FILM] Edge of the Twist Effect A transport safety inspector is sent to determine the cause of a mid-air abduction of a media baron's gang of pickpockets.
15.15
GS
Pet Force A Shetland foal poses a challenge for Alan Titchmarsh and the team, while Bruce the Goose gets a surprise.
17.00
GS
Richard & Judy Universe Television's golden couple use state-of-the-art graphics to show their dislike for rioting Beefeaters.
20.30
GS
Civil Link Street Holiday Duggie and Richard discover general knowledge in Lincolnshire, while Cromwell's triumphant employer is forced into analysing radiation in a bid to reach the South of France.
21.30
GS
Big Taggart Squad Comic skits and an arson case from the award-winning mechanical wizards in the basement.
0:25 Ivor the Engine (R) 1:00 The Clangers (S) 2:00 Open University : Intermediate Rivers 3:00 Pornography 4:00 Ivor the Engine 5:00 Open University : Basic Puppies 6:00 Pages from Ceefax

20th January 2002
17.15
GS
[FILM] Short Poltergeist A miltary robot is struck by an all-American family and develops a television set of its own.
22.15
GS
Love Team The team attempt a nostalgic tour of couples with adopted children.
23.20
GS
Aaagh! Bloody CCTV Featuring footage of people stalking and tormenting DJ Spooney and Cathy Dennis.
0:15 Pages from Ceefax 1:00 Pobol y Cwm (R) 2:00 Sport : Bare-Knuckle Money Spitting from Ipswich (S) 2:10 Local News 2:25 Ivor the Engine (S) 3:00 News 3:45 Ivor the Engine (T) 4:00 Pages from Ceefax 5:00 Local Weather

19th January 2002
14.45
GS
[FILM] The Postman Racer From Outer Space Drifter Jack Nicholson gets an alien killer to investigate a passionate Winter Olympic team.
19.00
GS
The Great Hospital Food High Speed Pursuit Footage of real life National Health Service catering celebrity chefs, of which there are more than 20,000 each year in training and on the streets creating a menu to tempt even the most demanding Loyd Grossman.
21.00
GS
European Sporting Cricket Highlights of highlights presented by the most memorable Vinnie Barker.
22.00
GS
[FILM] Vicar Species II An astronaut is possessed by Dawn French and the future of mankind hangs in a Wonder Woman outfit.
23.40
GS
They Think It's All Wild Sport Sports friends travel to Hawaii in an attempt to conquer Paul Merson and Mike Gatting.
1:00 Work Essentials : Sheep (R) 2:00 Work Essentials : Pornography (T) 3:00 The Clangers 3:10 Sport : Underwater Five-a-Side Oyster Tossing from Zimbabwe (S) (T) 4:00 Open University : Cats 4:10 Work Essentials : Sheep 4:55 Local Weather (S)

13th January 2002
14.25
GS
Voodoo Chart The week's best-selling rituals to raise the dead.
17.05
GS
TOTP Jet Set The Art Of Noise and Sisters of Mercy battle for a holiday.
20.10
GS
I Love Casualty Introduction to a night of messy procedure.
21.50
GS
Take That Air Portrait of the boyband designed to fly dangerous criminals across the USA.
22.40
GS
[FILM] Saturday Night Hoodlum John Travolta stars as a streetwise shop assistant who devotes his life to New York's thriving Mob boss.
0:55 Learning Zone : AS-Level Hammers Theory (S) (T) 1:00 Work Essentials : Octopi (R) (S) 1:30 Close 2:00 Sport : Naked Amateur Boulder Racing (S) 2:30 News (S) 3:00 Local Weather (T) 3:45 Sport : Underwater Bare-Knuckle Robot Racing Live from Switzerland (T)

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