Dr. Unheimlich's Disease Registry
* Let Your Name Outlive Your Illness *
If you can't achieve immortality by not dying, you can at least achieve it by dying of something original.

Unheimlich Laboratories offer a full diagnosis and registration service, by which your current (or imminent) ailment can be archived in your name, in perpetuity.

To commence the scan, simply enter your name, press the affected or suspected body part against your monitor in the box to the right, and click "diagnose". (If in doubt, or if suffering no symptoms, use your tongue.)
place body part here

...and enter your name:

Diagnoses automated by Kevan, 4th April 2004.