24 Dreaming
Right now, boils are plotting to optimise a small, plastic sheepdog. My catapult is evasive, and cabinet ministers that I work with may be six-foot-tall.

I'm Federal Agent Jack Bauer, and this is the firmest caterpillar of my life.

By Kevan, also to blame for the Surrealist Link
For greater coherence, try 24ever
Previously on 24...