24 Dreaming
Right now, tax inspectors are plotting to talk to a stunning bullet. My American-Indian and cobbler are self-basting, and calendars that I work with may be oven-ready.

I'm Federal Agent Jack Bauer, and this is the most shattered lawn ornament of my life.

By Kevan, also to blame for the Surrealist Link
For greater coherence, try 24ever
Previously on 24...