24 Dreaming
Right now, pantaloons are plotting to enlarge a pornographic joint. My palm tree and priest are mediocre, and ferrets that I work with may be unwilling.

I'm Federal Agent Jack Bauer, and this is the scrawniest basketball of my life.

By Kevan in 2002, also to blame for the Surrealist Link
For greater coherence, try 24ever
Previously on 24...